Is Your Stalker Ex Driving You Crazy?

By

Breakup Advice: Is Your Ex Stalking You?
You broke up a long time ago (and for a good reason), so why hasn't he gotten the memo?

You meet someone. You fall in love. You become involved in a relationship. Then ... something happens. Maybe one of you outgrows the other. Maybe you have different life goals. Maybe the passion waned and it was just time to call it quits before one or both of you was disappointed in the long run. Whatever the case, it resulted in a breakup. And in a normal world (with functional people) that would be that.

However, perhaps your ex was slightly possessive (which is really just a nice way of saying he was a controlling, crazy, nutcase who finally showed his true colors) and that was at least part of the reason you broke up in the first place. The problem? He just won't let go.

He switches between two modes. One minute, he's sincerely regretful: "Baby, I'm so sorry. I know I screwed up, but you have to give me another chance. I can make it right this time." (Yeah, right. Because you didn't fall for this line of crap and break up with him 18 times before.)

And the next minute, he's clinging to you in anger desperation: "You think I'm letting you go? Not  a chance. You may have broken up with me, but I did not break up with you. We're still together. Don't even think about being with anyone else."

The main issue: He says either (and sometimes both) of these statements all the time: at 4 a.m. — sometimes sober, sometimes drunk — at your job, at your doorstep, near your car at the mall (because he followed you from your three previous errands and "just had to talk to you") or — in extreme cases — at the foot of your bed, in the morning when he doesn't live with you anymore.

Those crazy whack-a-doos with their colossal lack of self control, inability to recognize boundaries and supreme mastery of denial! What on earth is wrong with them? Are they just a few sandwiches short of a picnic? Did they originate in the shallow end of the gene pool? Whatever the case, these kind of exes just can't let go. Keep reading...

More breakup advice from YourTango:

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Charles J. Orlando

Author

You can also follow me on:

http://www.facebook.com/theproblemismen

http://twitter.com/charlesjorlando

Email: advice@theproblemismen.com

Location: Los Angeles, CA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Charles J. Orlando:

The 4 Stages of Getting Back Together

By

Relationships are always easy — in the beginning. Both people are on their best behavior. They wear their fanciest clothes, are polite and put in boat-loads of love and effort. But sometimes, despite the initial euphoria and all those promises made, things don't go the way they were planned. Wants and needs change, life gets in the way, communication ... Read more

11 Lessons For My Graduating Son

By

Tomorrow you are graduating from high school and preparing to move on to what's next. It is a surreal moment for me, both as a parent and as a man. In watching you over these last 18 years, I have seen clearly that you have accomplished so much: as a young man, as an actor and as a human being. Your efforts and grades reflect your unwavering dedication to ... Read more

Ask An Expert: Why Did He Stop Texting Me?

By

Dear Charles: I went on a first date with a guy and I thought it went well. He texted me about an hour later and asked if we could get together again and I said I'd like that. We playfully chatted via text for a few hours that same day. It's a week later, and I haven't heard a thing from him. Why did he ask for a second date and not set anything ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB