Dear Taylor Swift,
I'm not trying to pull a Dr. Phil, but I am writing to you with a message. You and your fans might think I'm full of crap, but I already have a ton of haters, so a few more won't hurt.
Now, I don't often comment on celebrity issues, but since I have a bit of experience in the realm of relationships, I would be doing my readers a disservice if I didn't acknowledge what's happening by putting finger to keyboard. Please note that this is not a self-serving letter. In my experience, people sometimes need a wake-up call, and if I may be so bold, that is what I'm attempting to provide — both for you, and for the young, impressionable girls who look up to you. Please know that despite my direct tone, my goal is not to insult; it's to rattle you back to reality. Here goes.
I know what you've been doing. Your demure demeanor, your conservative style of dress, you lowering your head in coy, feigned naïvete for talk show hosts when the subject of your love life comes up ... it's an entire brand built around your innocence, and it's been executed brilliantly. But it's just as false as it is effective.
It might have some people fooled, but I'm not some people. I've connected with tens of thousands of women and men to form my conclusions and opinions, so I'm not coming at this half-cocked.
You've tried your hardest to be seen in the arms of [insert male singer/actor/Kennedy here], gallivanting around, publicly displaying affection. You know the media is following you ... which means you are looking for attention. I'm hardly the only person who has an opinion about your romantic/sexual exploits. However, you might want to brace yourself; this could get a little rough, not because I'm mean, but because no one has told you the street-smart truth.
But before I do, let's identify who's currently dog paddling in your wake of romantic destruction. There's Eddie Redmayne, Lucas Till, Patrick Schwarzenegger, Justin Gaston, Chord Overstreet, Tim Tebow, Garrett Hedlund, Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, Cory Monteith, John Mayer, Toby Hemingway, Jake Gyllenhaal, Will Anderson, Conor Kennedy and Harry Styles. That's 16 men in five years. And the result? You are perceived to be pure. America's quintessential sweetheart. Meanwhile, I only have one word: What?! Keep reading.
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