to the YourTango newsletter!

Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

Cheating Is A Choice...

By . Posted on .

Cheating Is A Choice...

Cheating is all the rage. Celbs and regular Moe’s alike are constantly getting called out by the press, by their [now ex] significant others, and the perpetually investigating paparazzi. Some have taken the road of silence and others come clean right away… but it’s been fascinating to watch the man cheaters confess (read: pour their hearts out to the world on how sorry they are.)

As a man, I have listened to these tearful laments and I can’t help but laugh. These men were just fine traipsing around the town with tender trollops in-tow—an unsuspecting wife or girlfriend holding down the proverbial fort, oftentimes dutifully caring for the kids—and now they want me to believe they’re sorry? Puh-lease. These cheaters aren’t sorry… they’re just sorry they got caught.

More from YourTango: The #1 Tell-Tale Sign For The Right Guy: His Smile

And with infidelity now headline news, the latest TV shows, magazine articles, and blog posts feature “real men” discussing cheating. These men are quasi-experts on cheating—because they did it. And look, I’m not here to pass judgment on their infidelity… I simply have an issue with their reasoning.

These “real men”—like all cheating men—have a wide variety of justifications of why they cheated… “She was constantly bitching at me. I had to get out of there,” or “I felt like I was playing a role. I stopped being real. The only way to shake myself out of it was to cheat,” or my personal favorite (and the most common) “I didn’t mean it. It was an accident.

My conclusion on these reasons (and any others): Bull. Bull. BULL!

Sorry, guys. You can pull that line on the press, on your mothers, or on your now-estranged wives/girlfriends, but that crap doesn’t work on someone who knows—someone who has been there (years ago, long before I was married).

But let’s get something straight. I recognize that monogamy isn't for everyone. In fact, many argue that it's not a "natural state" for men. In many ways, I think those people are right. DNA-wise, both genders are driven by primal instincts to continue our species, not concentrate on the sanctity of marriage. However, humans now claim to be civilized, and if a person decides to delve into the world of commitment, marriage, and fidelity, they should hold to the ideals that accompany that choice. If you don’t want a commitment… don’t get married!

More from YourTango: Why Straight Men Don't Want To Believe Jason Collins Is Gay

Next: The Truth of the Matter

More Juicy Content From YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Charles Orlando

Author

You can also follow me on:

http://www.facebook.com/theproblemismen

http://twitter.com/charlesjorlando

Email: advice@theproblemismen.com

Location: Los Angeles, CA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Charles Orlando:

The #1 Tell-Tale Sign For The Right Guy: His Smile

By

Date a man who smiles. Date a man who spends his time on improving himself emotionally as well as physically. He might have issues with time, because he has an unquenchable thirst for living and for life. Date a man who has a list of things he wants to learn... about himself, about the world around him and about others. Find a man who smiles. The smiling ... Read more

Why Straight Men Don't Want To Believe Jason Collins Is Gay

By

Unless you've been completely offline, Sports Illustrated broke the news that NBA center Jason Collins is making history as the first openly gay male athlete in professional U.S. sports. Since then, social media has exploded with supportive messages. NBA Commissioner David Stern offered his support by stating, "We are proud he has assumed the ... Read more

10 Tell-Tale Signs That He's Cheating

By

He's acting ... differently, but you just can't put your finger on why. Then, his cell phone rings in in the middle of the night ... and he doesn't have a good explanation. Is he cheating or is he just going through a rough time? We've all heard the "he blames you for cheating" and "his cell phone has a password on it" ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
deep breath

Does a woman need a room of her own?

A woman requires a sweet spot hideout to release her inner core, the most erogenous zone of all.

Surf

Getting Physical: 5 Date Night Ideas For Athletic Couples

5 Date Night Ideas For Athletic Couples. Love getting physical…I mean doing physical activities.

Floor

Making Kale Sexy

Kale is Sexy. View kale as a green, libido boosting veggie, not just a hippy snack.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS