Cheating Is A Choice...

Cheating is all the rage. Celbs and regular Moe’s alike are constantly getting called out by the press, by their now ex significant others, and the perpetually investigating paparazzi. Some have taken the road of silence and others come clean right away… but it’s been fascinating to watch the man cheaters confess (read: pour their hearts out to the world on how sorry they are.)

As a man, I have listened to these tearful laments and I can’t help but laugh. These men were just fine traipsing around the town with tender trollops in-tow—an unsuspecting wife or girlfriend holding down the proverbial fort, oftentimes dutifully caring for the kids—and now they want me to believe they’re sorry? Puh-lease. These cheaters aren’t sorry… they’re just sorry they got caught.

And with infidelity now headline news, the latest TV shows, magazine articles, and blog posts feature “real men” discussing cheating. These men are quasi-experts on cheating—because they did it. And look, I’m not here to pass judgment on their infidelity… I simply have an issue with their reasoning.

These “real men”—like all cheating men—have a wide variety of justifications of why they cheated… “She was constantly bitching at me. I had to get out of there,” or “I felt like I was playing a role. I stopped being real. The only way to shake myself out of it was to cheat,” or my personal favorite (and the most common) “I didn’t mean it. It was an accident.”

My conclusion on these reasons (and any others): Bull. Bull. BULL!

Sorry, guys. You can pull that line on the press, on your mothers, or on your now-estranged wives/girlfriends, but that crap doesn’t work on someone who knows—someone who has been there (years ago, long before I was married).

But let’s get something straight. I recognize that monogamy isn't for everyone. In fact, many argue that it's not a "natural state" for men. In many ways, I think those people are right. DNA-wise, both genders are driven by primal instincts to continue our species, not concentrate on the sanctity of marriage. However, humans now claim to be civilized, and if a person decides to delve into the world of commitment, marriage, and fidelity, they should hold to the ideals that accompany that choice. If you don’t want a commitment… don’t get married!

So… here’s the REAL truth: Cheating is always a choice. Those that claim it was “an accident” or offer any other reason are completely and totally FULL. OF. IT. They are choosing to cheat for one simple reason: Selfishness. They care more about the sex they can get, rather than their significant other, whose trust they are betraying. And this is betrayal… a special betrayal saved for a man’s spouse or girlfriend.