Hey Scarlett, Tired of Feeling Invisible? Stop Being So Nice!

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Hey Scarlett, Tired of Feeling Invisible?  Stop Being So Nice!
Do you sabotage your love life by being too nice? 5 easy steps to shed the super sweet vibe.

Think about Samantha and Miranda on Sex in the City.  Scarlett through and through, Samantha always tells it like it is.  Even though Miranda may be abrupt, she always expresses true affection in her Scarlett way.  Neither were as sweet as Charlotte and you never saw them try to be.

Do people tell you how sweet you are and you think, "I am not sweet.?" Do you have some crash and burns that chain you to the couch for days, weeks or even months?  Do you have road rage?  Do girlfriends let you down again and again?  If so, here are some quick steps you can take to claim your Scarlett Sass and be sweet no more!

1.  Investigate: Think back to your growing up years.  Was there an extra special and very sweet person in your life?  A dear grandma or adored elderly neighbor or maybe even a music teacher?  Let your Inner Being shine the spot light on that person.  Chances are she was an unintentional role model for you in the past and you created a belief that her nature was some how more valuable than yours.

2.  Reclaim: Think of someone in your life who really bugs you.  Not a family member or close friend.  Someone who is inefficient at work is perfect.  Ask yourself this question, "Why does it bother me that she_______________?"  Whatever answer you receive internally, ask another "Why does that bothe"r me question.  Repeat this as many times as you want.  Notice your feelings and thoughts.  Does your throat feel tight?  Does your belly feel upset?  Just notice what you feel and think.  Lay your hand on the part of your body that is getting your attention and breathe, breathe, breathe.  That is your real self feeling its real feeling and whatever comes to you is a message from your Inner Being.

3.  Write a letter: Write a letter to yourself as a child (I know this is a little woowoo, but bear with me...how much do you want to find a man?)  Tell your young self that it wasn't such a good idea to try to be some one else and that you can see how hard it has been. 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Catherine Behan

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