How this Lovely Snow White can pick the Perfect Dad when she is ready to be a mother.
"I'd like to be a mom within 5 years." Anne Hathaway told James Franco in a recent interview on Good Morning America, making inquiring minds wonder what kind of man will be hers when she is ready for motherhood.
While the undeniable chemistry Hathaway enjoys with Franco is delicious and will make for a great Oscar Show, can Anne attract someone in real life with that kind of intoxicating chemistry and a good guy too? The collapse of her relationship with Italian real estate developer Raffaello Follieri in 2008 and the fact that she was seemingy blindsided by his illegal activities must have shocked her to the core.
When she is ready for motherhood, how will she trust herself to pick a man well suited to her? How can she keep from being hypnotized by crazy chemistry and fooled by the lies of an opportunistic man?
"I feel like I have to apologize for myself in front of most people." Anne said in her W Magazine interview. I felt an immediate sisterhood with this Oscar Nominated and now Oscar Hostessing star. I have been a fan since The Princess Diaries. Reminiscent of Mary Tyler Moore, this rising star's charisma is unmistakeable.
I was drawn to look at Hathaway's relationship sabotage after reading about her breakup with Follieri. I suspected she was a Snow White and when she mentioned apologizing all over herself, that sealed it. I have a Snow White Sabotage Style myself when it comes to relationships, so I can relate. But, in order to confidently transition into motherhood, she will need to communicate clearly with her man.
Snow White is the True Love Sabotage Style that can traps a sensitive woman in a cage of perfectionism and fear of letting people down. Hiding behind a mask of "I can handle everything thrown at me." her friends and contacts see her as capable and independent. But Snow Whites sabotage themselves by seeing only the good in people and can naively trust people with questionable agendas.
Giving loved ones the benefit of the doubt, it is excruciatingly difficult to confront the yellow flags that wave at her from the sidelines. When Anne lived with Follieri, her inner guidance was no doubt screaming at her, but in true Snow White fashion, she no doubt turned from the evidence of his poor character.
Snow White is expert at seeing the silver lining and will make excuses, over accommodate and put up with more than the other Saboteur Styles. Anne, having put her love life on hold, has devoted her energies to not only her career, she also is passionate about children's charities. Both efforts are thriving with her focus.
So what can a positive in life but disillusioned in love Snow White to do? Being blindsided by someone you adore is hard for anyone, but especially devastating for sensitive and dreamy Snow White. If she wants her next man to be The Man, she must keep her head and her heart in the game.
Successful Snow Whites like Ellen Degeneres or Julia Roberts live private lives that work. They are able to pick the work they love to do, get paid very well for it and enjoy a flourishing love relationship with partners who compliment them beautifully.
Here are some steps any Snow White can take to step out of your self sabotage and draw in a partner who is a perfect match and great dad:
1. Stop Apologizing: Snow White is famous for saying "I'm sorry." Manic apologizing weakens your personal magnetism every time....it is self sabotage at its awful best. Start by observing yourself for a week or so. Just tally the 'sorries' as they appear in your daily language. You have to realize that when you apologize, your friends and family are put in an awkward position. They don't feel the need for an apology and will resist intimacy. For a Snow White that craves closeness, this is critical.
2. Ask For Support When You Need It: Snow White is productive, efficient and driven. She sets up her world so she can be independent and self-sustaining. Especially after a disastrous breakup, she can create an even more convincing mask. Always cheerful and resilient, her optimism can be a trap. Snow White must trust a faithful friend, colleague or coach to help her emotionally. She is not in this alone.
3. Spend Time Outside: Nature is a magic elixer for all Saboteur types, but trees, water and animals are especially precious to Snow White. Working with horses would be deeply meaningful for her. Because everyone depends on Snow White, people can be draining. Animals can't talk back and make fantastic listeners.
4. Tell Your Story Mindfully: One of the things I admire about Anne Hathaway is her spin on the challenges she has faced. In regard to personal strife and subsequent media attention, Hathaway uses a mantra that quotes Oscar WIlde: "The less said about life's sores the better." This is brilliant. It will be crucial for Anne to tell the story of her breakup with her ex in an honest but not sugar-coated way.
5. Trust Yourself To Trust Yourself Again: After a blindside, Snow White can get lost in her passions and career. This works as achievement is like catnip to many Snow Whites. The vital key to finding True Love is to learn to trust the inner senses that are designed to guard against the players in life.
Naturally and charmingly naive, this True Love Saboteur must see the flaws in others realistically. When she feels yellow flags, she must stop and look both ways. She will succeed in love when she trusts herself more than anyone else.
Wonder if you could be a Snow White? Or maybe you are a Rapunzel or Scarlett... Take the True Love Sabotage Survey and find out: http://budurl.com/lovesabotage