5 Things You Should Never Say To Your Husband


5 Things You Should Never Say To Your Husband [EXPERT]
When it comes to these comments, it's best to keep your mouth shut.
Learn to communicate constructively with your man.

3. "That's all you did?" Look, in a perfect world, our husbands would read our minds in the most symbiotic, fantastical way. But that's not reality (yes, it's time for you to wake the f*ck up). If you have an expectation of something that your husband is going to do, own your assumptions rather than vomit your disappointment in his general direction.

Your husband offered to help you straighten up the kids' rooms while you go to the market. You come home to see that his definition of "straightening up" is him pulling the blankets to the top of the beds, and shoving the mound of toys to one side of the wall. In your head you're thinking your 6-year-old could do a better job.

More from YourTango: 4 Skills You Need Before Getting Married

However, hopefully you realize that you were not as specific with what "straightening up the kids' rooms" means to you. So instead try this: "I really appreciate you offering to straighten up their rooms. I realize that I made a mistake not being more specific with you about where the toys should go, and how the beds are made, so next time, I'll be more specific. Thanks for your help though!"

4. "Stop touching me!" Yikes. We all know this one: hubby wants to get sexy times on and you'd rather stick needles in your eyes after the vomit-inducing, child screaming, stressful work day you've just had. But guess what? You're allowed to feel that way, and you're allowed to select the pause button in response.

Instead, first respond with a kiss or hug (come on...he needs a frickin' bone) and say: "Honey, I just need to decompress from the day so that I can really be present with you."

He's not stupid; he'll get the hint without you making him feel like a total reject. The only caveat is that this doesn't mean you get a free hall pass for the week: You're just as responsible for your sexual relationship as he is. So, do what ever jedi mind tricks you have to do to get present for sex and know that it's your responsibility to let him know when you're ready and able... 5 Ways To Keep Married Sex Exciting

More from YourTango: When Will He Propose? Men Reveal Their Secrets

5. "You're pathetic." Ouch! Ladies, this is so not cool to say to anyone. How old are you? Kids say this to other kids when they feel angry, hurt, sad, dissapointed, etc. Own your feelings, and communicate them like an adult.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Carin Goldstein MFT

Marriage and Family Therapist

Carin Goldstein, MFT is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Los Angeles as well as the witty writer of Be the Smart Wife where she writes about the trials and tribulations of how to naviagate through your marriage. Sign up for Be the Smart Wife bi-weekly posts and connect with Carin on facebook and twitter. If you live in the Los Angeles area and are interested in learning more about Carin's psychotherapy services, visit her website at

Location: Sherman Oaks, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Empowering Women, Marriage
Other Articles/News by Carin Goldstein MFT:

Avoid The Gimmicks: The True Meaning Behind Valentine's Day


In my opinion, there are two holidays that may be the most anti-climactic of them all, setting most of us up for disappointment: the first being New Year's Eve and second being (of course) ... Valentine's Day. Though as you read this article, know that this is not an anti-Valentines Day scolding or "how Hallmark has successfully brainwashed our ... Read more

ADD & Holiday Stress: Why You Are A Ferrari With Bicycle Brakes


If you are a woman who struggles with ADD, I know how you must feel during the holidays: overwhelmed. Correction: beyond overwhelmed.  Here's why: Most people with ADD have an overabundance of zest and excitement for life, but throw in the holidays, family, parties, gifts, vacations, and other miscellaneous drama and you've got an ADD woman on ... Read more

Sorry, Your Nagging Is Really About You


"You actually call this making the bed?! This is ridiculous. You need to do it the way I do it." "Will you turn the TV off already and help me get these wet, naked children out of the bath?!" "Thanks for not giving me a kiss goodbye this morning… You know, it would be nice if you thought about me before ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Hug Text

The Case of the Ex

Does the mother of his kids want him back?

Winter Pair

Exactly What to Say to Men in Difficult Situations

In dating, good communication is the key to meeting and attracting men… especially the right men.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>