5 Things You Should Never Say To Your Husband


5 Things You Should Never Say To Your Husband [EXPERT]
Learn to communicate constructively with your man.

3. "That's all you did?" Look, in a perfect world, our husbands would read our minds in the most symbiotic, fantastical way. But that's not reality (yes, it's time for you to wake the f*ck up). If you have an expectation of something that your husband is going to do, own your assumptions rather than vomit your disappointment in his general direction.

Your husband offered to help you straighten up the kids' rooms while you go to the market. You come home to see that his definition of "straightening up" is him pulling the blankets to the top of the beds, and shoving the mound of toys to one side of the wall. In your head you're thinking your 6-year-old could do a better job.


However, hopefully you realize that you were not as specific with what "straightening up the kids' rooms" means to you. So instead try this: "I really appreciate you offering to straighten up their rooms. I realize that I made a mistake not being more specific with you about where the toys should go, and how the beds are made, so next time, I'll be more specific. Thanks for your help though!"

4. "Stop touching me!" Yikes. We all know this one: hubby wants to get sexy times on and you'd rather stick needles in your eyes after the vomit-inducing, child screaming, stressful work day you've just had. But guess what? You're allowed to feel that way, and you're allowed to select the pause button in response.

Instead, first respond with a kiss or hug (come on...he needs a frickin' bone) and say: "Honey, I just need to decompress from the day so that I can really be present with you."

He's not stupid; he'll get the hint without you making him feel like a total reject. The only caveat is that this doesn't mean you get a free hall pass for the week: You're just as responsible for your sexual relationship as he is. So, do what ever jedi mind tricks you have to do to get present for sex and know that it's your responsibility to let him know when you're ready and able... 5 Ways To Keep Married Sex Exciting

5. "You're pathetic." Ouch! Ladies, this is so not cool to say to anyone. How old are you? Kids say this to other kids when they feel angry, hurt, sad, dissapointed, etc. Own your feelings, and communicate them like an adult.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by

Carin Goldstein MFT

Marriage and Family Therapist

Carin Goldstein, MFT is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Los Angeles as well as the witty writer of Be the Smart Wife where she writes about the trials and tribulations of how to naviagate through your marriage. Sign up for Be the Smart Wife bi-weekly posts and connect with Carin on facebook and twitter. If you live in the Los Angeles area and are interested in learning more about Carin's psychotherapy services, visit her website at caringoldstein.com.

Location: Sherman Oaks, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Empowering Women, Marriage
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