18 Signs You’re A Victim Of Gaslighting

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Tell-Tale Signs You’re A Victim Of Gaslighting
Buzz, Heartbreak

And if you experience them, run.

This is not a new concept but it is receiving more attention as abuse is hitting the media more often, unfortunately.

Gaslighting is part of emotional or mental abuse. Gaslighting can make you feel crazy and literally question your sanity. You may start to question yourself and possibly stop believing in yourself. The signs typically develop over time and are likely very subtle. 

So, what exactly is gaslighting? Gaslighting can be defined as a type of emotional or psychological abuse in which the abuser questions or denies the victim’s reality.

In turn, the victim starts to question their own sanity and truth. The abuser achieves this by twisting the victim’s words or flat out lies about things.

Here are the tell-tale signs that someone is gaslighting you or another person. Stay informed and pass on this information because you never know who’s life you are saving:

1. You feel something is off but can't pinpoint what or why.

How can you possibly tell anyone that something is wrong or off if you don’t know how to explain it or specifically what it is? This makes the victim weaker and more isolated.

2. You have frequent feelings of confusion and disorientation.

You feel like you're in a daze and things around you are blurred.

3. Your partner's actions do not align with what they're saying.

What they are saying and what they do are completely different

Remember this: when a story or explanation starts becoming confusing or not making sense, it’s likely the other person is lying.


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4. You start doubting yourself, making it difficult for you to make decisions.

Your ability to make simple decisions becomes increasingly difficult.

5. You constantly apologize for what you do or who you are.

Even though you have no idea what you did or why the abuser is saying or doing things, you will apologize in hopes of smoothing things over.

6. You feel unusually fearful and scared of your partner.

You become increasingly fearful of the abuser. You don’t know who to tell or what to do because you can’t exactly put your finger on why you’re afraid.

7. You never feel good enough for you partner.

How can you feel good enough for the abuser when they are constantly putting you down?

8. You find it increasingly difficult to trust your own judgment.

You start believing things are made up in your head and you can’t think straight. You start doubting your intuition and gut feelings and start believing their judgments.

9. You feel as if you're "neurotic" or "losing it.

They will brainwash you to a point of questioning your own sanity and judgment. You will feel like you're going crazy.

10. You're afraid and fearful to speak up about anything or stick up for yourself.

You want to avoid confrontation at all costs so you remain silent.


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11. You second-guess your ability to recall past events and details.

Because you start believing their judgments and versions of events, you start to second and third guess yourself and wonder if certain things were completely made up in your own mind.

12. You always feel like you're overreacting or being too sensitive.

You blame yourself by telling yourself that you’re overreacting or being too sensitive.

13. You feel hopeless and helpless.

You feel trapped and feel there’s no way out.

14. Your partner calls you crazy or tell others you're crazy.

They want you to feel crazy and want others around you to think you are crazy so that you are isolated in your thoughts and mind.

15. Your partner tells you everyone else is a liar.

They will never admit they did something wrong or lied about anything. They will portray themselves to be perfect and everyone else out to be the bad ones.

16. Your partner takes what you value and love most and uses it against you.

Your family. Your friends. Your classmates. Your professors. School. Anything that you value and is important to you may be used against you.

17. Your partner denies they ever said or did anything — even with solid evidence presented.

You can tell them that the sky is blue and they will continue to tell you the sky is red or green.

18. Your partner attempts to get other people to go against you.

They want you to have no one. They want you to be alone and isolated with no one to tell you the truth or plant the seed that something is wrong with the abuser.

Gaslighting is extremely dangerous and harmful to your overall mental health. It is so dangerous because of the slow progression and subtle acts that over time, it becomes more and more serious.

You should never doubt your instincts and always listen to yourself when something feels off. You don’t owe an explanation to anyone about why or how a person is affecting you because if they’re negatively impacting your life, you need to end it before it goes any further. You are not alone.


RELATED: If You're Being Emotionally Abused, These 7 Steps Will Make It Stop


Brittney Lindstrom is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Rehabilitation Counselor.

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