9 Steps To Setting And Reaching Relationship Goals

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YourTango Experts help you set and meet relationship goals for a happier love life and happier you.

5. Throughout, take care of your well-being. Do things that make you feel calm and joyful, a fullness that will carry over to your dating life or partner.

Sarah Showfety, Life/Relationship Coach


6. Create a vision board. First, define your vision for your ideal partner, if single, or your ideal partnership, if you're already in a relationship. What are the qualities you're seeking, and of those characteristics, which of those needs are negotiable versus deal breakers? Break out your "inner child" and create a collage or mobile representing this vision by cutting out words, pictures, and symbols from magazines that resonate with these desires and affixing them to a big poster board. Post the vision board in a location of your home where you'll view it every day and ask yourself each morning, "What will I do today that will take me one step closer to achieving this particular vision?" And then commit yourself to doing it.

7. Establish a "Relationship Pow-Wow." To ensure your goals don't get forgotten or misguided, you and your partner can establish a regularly scheduled "couple's meeting" during which you discuss your relationship and the status of your goals. It's a time to talk about what's going well, what's not going so well, your dreams and goals, your progress with stated goals, etc. The Pow-Wow is a great way to stay accountable to your relationship goals, so stay true to the process and don't skip any meetings! Many Couples No Longer Communicate In Person

8. Don't get overwhelmed. If your goals start to feel daunting, try to break them down into smaller steps that you feel more at ease achieving. Keep your goals SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, & Timely).

9. Celebrate your successes. Build in incentives and/or consequences for meeting your objectives along the way for motivation enhancement. Setting and meeting goals is truly something to celebrate.

Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, Counselor/Therapist

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Brian Rzepczynski


Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, Licensed Relationship Coach, is The Gay Love Coach: “I work with gay men who are ready to create a road map that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right.” To sign up for the FREE Gay Love Coach Newsletter filled with dating, relationship, and sexual enrichment tips and skills for gay singles and couples, as well as to check out current coaching groups, programs, and teleclasses, please visit http://www.TheGayLoveCoach.com

Location: Aurora, IL
Credentials: LCSW, MSW, Other
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Dating/Being Single Support, Gay/Lesbian/Identity Issues, Sex Therapy
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