Whether you’re out there looking for a compatible mate, are dating someone new, or have been seeing your current partner for awhile, try these approaches to enliven and enrich the connection between you..
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Tip #1: Personalize your Expressions of Attraction
Notice a quality about this intriguing person that you find particularly appealing. Perhaps it’s the warmth in his smile; the gleam in her eyes; his way with words; her wit, grace
or charm; the lilt in his voice. (If possible try to focus in on a non-physical
quality, first. It shows the other person that you’re not simply interested in
superficial physical appearance, and have some depth and sensitivity. Since personality and subtler emotional qualities can be expressed through the eyes, the voice or the way one smiles, it's fine to talk about these attributes.)
Now, express your attraction, but instead of saying “You’ve got beautiful eyes, or
you have a nice smile, or you’re very funny. Use “I” statements: - “I love your eyes”, “I like your smile”, “I love the way your mind works.” Personalizing your compliment
by using “I” rather than objectifying it with “you” creates a flow of intimate
energy between you.
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Tip #2: Sensualize Your Expressions of Attraction
To “sensualize” a phrase is to use words that evoke a physical or emotional connection to your partner and tjat allude to the five senses - sight, sound, taste, touch and smell.
For example, if you and your partner are dancing and you’re enjoying the
experience, instead of saying “you’re a great dancer” or even the more intimate “I
love the way you dance” - try “I love the way you feel in my arms” or It feels so
nice to be in your arms”. Or, if you’re doing non-touch dancing try “I love the
way you move”.
Instead of “Mmm, that’s nice cologne” or “I love your cologne”. Try, “Mmmm, I
love the way you smell. I could breathe you in like this for hours.” Instead of “I
like the way you kiss” try “I love the way your lips taste.” Other phrases you can
use to bring a sensual aura to your communication are, “I love the soft and silky
feeling of your hair against my cheek”, “Your skin feels so smooth to my touch”, “
I like the way your hand feels in mine” and “I love the way you’re looking at me
Tip #3: Validate Your Partner’s Affectionate Behavior Toward You