Do Something Different Today to Improve Your Search for Love


While you’re at it, feel free to peruse the lingerie section and fantasize a little. Again… smile.

8. Ask the guy behind you in line any insignificant question. I don’t know what. Just think of something. Try “Do you know what time they close today?”


9. Ask another stylish woman for a referral to her salon and make an appointment for a pedicure or new hairstyle.

10. Ask two men you trust to tell you something about men they think every woman should know.

One last thing. You must do one more giant thing differently today: silence those old recordings in your head that have been guiding your response and relationship to men. You know what I’m talking about. “If a man doesn’t like me the way I look, he’s superficial and he’s not for me anyway.” “I don’t need to ask a man to help me do anything. I’ve been doing things myself for a long time, and quite well!” “I’m too shy or bloated or busy or tall or out of practice or chubby or scared or independent to talk to some strange man in the grocery store.”

Stop that! Just for one day. When I tell you that I was expert in singing those tunes that is an understatement. Back in the day, I won the prize for sabotaging self-talk. You can, and you will, stop it; with practice.

Big change starts with one small step. Do something to get you to connect, learn something, feel pretty, or feel powerful. You just might learn that it’s not so scary, alter your perception, and enjoy some new and positive experiences. And hey, you might even have some fun!

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Bobbi Palmer

Dating Coach

The Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40 and founder of Date LIke a Grownup.
Register for Bobbi's free monthly webcasts Grownup Girls' Night Out: Let's Talk About Men! where she gives you tips and tools about dating, sex, relationships and more!


Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Communication Problems, Dating/Being Single Support, Empowering Women, Wellness
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