I recommend that your mantra as you meet men be "discover, don't decide." Give your intuition a holiday and tune into what your grownup woman is saying. If you find yourself getting swept away and can't articulate why, then tap on the brakes for a while. He'll still be there when the grownup part of you decides he's got what it takes for you to be happy as partners.
A lasting relationship with a good guy is more likely to begin when you're clear about what you want and you allow yourself to see him as a real person. Dump your checklist and judge him based on the real stuff. After all, you're looking for a life partner not just a good date. Life and love with a real man is so much better than chasing after an elusive fantasy.