So-So First Date? Why He Deserves A Second Chance

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So-So First Date? Why He Deserves A Second Chance [EXPERT]
Are you expecting him to wow you right away?

Overall, the Wow-Me Woman's man needs to give her "that feeling." When I'm coaching her, she tells me: "It was amazing! I could tell right away that we had an amazing connection! I've been waiting so long to meet this guy!" I'm always tempted to reply, "How’s that instant connection thing working for you so far?"

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all for feeling a spark on the first date or two. But the Wow-Me Woman is so sure she has to feel the shazam-factor that she wouldn't even recognize a small flame. She's holding out for the blazing bonfire and if it doesn't happen right away, she's not sticking around. She will snuff out the best of the best.

Anthony's story:

I dated for a lot of years and met a ton of women. We'd have a good phone call and then we'd usually meet for coffee. A lot of them seemed to lose interest pretty quickly. I always felt like I was being tested. It was like: 'Show me what you got!' And if I didn't perform in the first 10 minutes, I could tell she would shut down. Like I disappointed her somehow.

I understand that I'm not Denzel Washington. But I'm educated, I have a good job, and I'm damn nice. And I was serious about finding the right woman for me. Apparently I was supposed to jump through some hoops to get their attention.

My wife didn't fall in love with me instantly. But we liked each other, and after a few dates we knew we had potential. And we've ended up being a great team. She's the greatest. I actually feel bad for those women. They're probably all still single.

You can probably imagine how it feels when you have to do some song and dance to get attention from someone you're meeting for the first time.  You've probably even felt like this with some of the men you've met. It's like you have a few minutes to pass some test; and if you don't, he's essentially done.

Feels crappy, doesn't it? I can't tell you how many times I've been told by women how unfair it is that men don't even give women a chance. Well, we can do the very same thing.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.
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Advanced Member

Bobbi Palmer

Dating Coach

The Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40 and founder of Date LIke a Grownup.
Register for Bobbi's free monthly webcasts Grownup Girls' Night Out: Let's Talk About Men! where she gives you tips and tools about dating, sex, relationships and more!
 


 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Communication Problems, Dating/Being Single Support, Empowering Women, Wellness
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