5 Must-Dos For Every First Date

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5 Must-Dos For Every First Date
Learn Bobbi Palmer's FLIRT System: 5 Must-Do's on Every First Date.

I= be In the moment. Be “present” on your date. Don’t compare him to men in the past, nor should you project into the future. That means not having that internal conversation about whether he could be The One, analyzing everything he says, or trying to figure out what he’s not saying. I encourage my coaching clients to stay in the DISCOVER mode on the first few dates. Find out about him and just experience what it feels like to be with him. There will be plenty of time for the DECIDE phase later on.

R= be Real. Being genuine is the only way to attract the right man. You have nothing to prove, you don’t have to appear to be perfect, and you don’t have to twist like a pretzel to be what you think he wants you to be. Put down your protective walls and your “I’m just fine without a man” attitude…and be You. The right guy will appreciate you, and the wrong one won't. Perfect!

T= Talk about yourself. Why would a man want a second date with you if he goes home knowing nothing about you? Sometimes a man will spend most of the time talking about himself. This can be out of nervousness, because he’s trying too hard to impress you or because you interrogated him and he’s simply answering all your questions. It’s important that you squeeze in what I call your “nuggets.” These are important bits of information about you, such as what you're proud of, what you care about, or what you most like to spend your time doing. These are all things that help a man get to know you.

While you may never know the exact reason a man doesn't call, following my FLIRT guidelines means you won't have to doubt yourself after dates. If he doesn’t call, you’ll know that you did nothing wrong; you just weren't a good match. Get over it and move on to the next man. Don’t let self-doubt and “what ifs” keep you from moving forward to finding true love.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Bobbi Palmer

Dating Coach

The Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40 and founder of Date LIke a Grownup.
Register for Bobbi's free monthly webcasts Grownup Girls' Night Out: Let's Talk About Men! where she gives you tips and tools about dating, sex, relationships and more!
 


 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Communication Problems, Dating/Being Single Support, Empowering Women, Wellness
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