3 Pattern-Busting Tips For More Passionate Love


Love, Passion, & Romance: Relationship Advice For Women
Try these 3 great ways to bust up routine and reignite your intimacy, passion, and play!

Get curious. I wonder how it feels to be out cutting the grass on a summer Sunday morning? I wonder how it would feel to cook dinner rather than do the cleanup? How does that washing machine/power tool/food processor actually work? Switch chores and have fun with it!

This is an opportunity to trade tasks and observe what your partner sees and feels. Actually, you won't see or feel like your partner does; you'll have your own experience. And here's where the play part comes in. How can you approach these "new" tasks with humor, delight and lightheartedness — with a wide-eyed wondering about what you can simultaneously learn about yourself and appreciate about your partner?

Here's one additional role reversal challenge: Plan a romantic evening, preferably at home (yes, sex can be part of this one!). Plan it together, but when you're figuring out who's going to do what, change up your normal roles. So if she plans and makes the food, he should get cooking. If he traditionally purchases the sexy lingerie or the sex toys, she does it. If he generally selects, uncorks and pours the wine, she takes a stab. If she organizes the babysitter, he does it. You get the idea!

Now, we're not suggesting that you permanently change up your roles and tasks — only that you play with them every once in a while. And pay attention to what comes up for you, how you feel, how you react, what you like, what you don't like. You can then settle back into your day-to-day routines (possibly slightly altered) with a new appreciation for yourself and your partner... and a willingness to not take it all quite so seriously!

These are just a very few ways that you can add intimacy, passion and play to your relationship. Don't let the same-old, same-old become the norm. Play, experiment, expand and open to the possibility that your relationship is full of rich learning and a whole realm of fun!

Pattern-busting, role-playing, priority-making, re-magnetizing — these are all topics covered in 24 Shades of Red: Reigniting Intimacy, Passion and Play, our online extravaganza designed to bring some high octane rocket fuel to your relationship. 24 experts, 8 minute videos, exercises and experiments for you to try today.

Article contributed by

Bob Tomes & Jane Warren

Relationship Coach

Jane Warren & Bob Tomes are established relationship coaches and educators assisting people who are looking to create a vibrant life and relationship.

Stay connected with Jane & Bob through their FREE bi-weekly Relationship Newsletter at Vibrant Couples and if you're impacted by divorce connect with them at SpringBoard Divorce.


Location: Calgary, AB, Canada
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Divorce/Divorce Prevention, Stepfamilies
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