to the YourTango newsletter!

Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

The Dreaded Budget

By . Posted on .

The Dreaded Budget
Couples argue about the budget for one reason: the budget doesn’t work if you don't agree on it

Couples argue about the budget for one reason and one reason only: the budget doesn’t work. You already know your budget doesn’t work. What you don’t know is why.

Challenge: Why your budget doesn’t work
Most couples leave little to no wiggle room in the budget for unexpected expenses. Can you think of a single week of your life where everything went as planned? No. So why would you create a budget that is unable to accommodate real life?

More from YourTango: Just Graduated? 5 Ways To Avoid Money Fights With Mom & Dad

Couples mistake the budget for communication about money. Creating a budget is not the same thing as talking about your money. The budget is useless if you never talk about it.

Fear and guilt get in the way of talking about the budget. You have to talk about your budget, but too many couples end up arguing instead of talking. That leads to a complete breakdown not only in the budget but in your money relationship.

Solution: Making a budget work for you
Treat your budget like a road map, not a rule book. A budget is a tool, a plan for getting you someplace. Having a budget isn’t the goal. Sticking to the budget isn’t even the goal. Using the budget to help you achieve financial freedom and have the financial future you’ve dreamed of is the goal. So make sure your budget can flex with your life. Make sure it—and you--won’t fall apart with one car repair or broken washing machine.

Create the budget together, talk about the budget together. The key word in that sentence? Together. Both partners have to have buy-in on the budget or it simply won’t work. And buy-in only comes through honest conversations about plans, dreams, values, and behaviors. When it comes to making a budget work, there can’t be a “money person.” You have to determine financial goals together, create a budget together, review your income and spending together, and make adjustments together.

Grace takes the stress out of budgets. Every budget gets broken now and then. So expect it. Prepare for it. And when it happens, move on. Scolding and accusations won’t repair your budget but they will definitely damage your relationship. So extend some grace and understanding to each other.

Reclaim those dreams you had as a new couple and reach them together.

More from YourTango: Mother's Day: 3 Creative Ways To Show Your Love For Mom

Make your money relationship stronger and healthier with simple tips from our NEW BOOK

 


 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Scott And Bethany Palmer The Money Couple

YourTango Expert Partner

The Money Couple, Scott & Bethany Palmer are authors, regulars on national TV, radio and speak internationally about “Love and Money”. With 40 years of combined financial planning experience they launched The Money Couple® and have dedicated their lives to helping couples bring their love and money together. Scott and Bethany enjoy an active lifestyle living in Colorado with their two young sons, Cole and Cade.

Take our FREE Money Personality Quiz

Check for Financial Infidelity with our FREE Money Relationship Index

Sign up to receive the FREE Money Couple Minute!  click here

See our NEW BOOK, The 5 Money Personalities™: Speaking the Same Love and Money Language

Location: Colorado Springs, CO
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Scott and Bethany Palmer The Money Couple:

Just Graduated? 5 Ways To Avoid Money Fights With Mom & Dad

By

Sometimes things don't go as planned. You picked a great college, studied hard (most days), and wore the cap and gown—so where is the great job, fat paycheck, and place to call your own? If you're like most college graduates these days, there is no high-paying job, and your new place looks a lot like your old room at Mom and Dad's ... Read more

Mother's Day: 3 Creative Ways To Show Your Love For Mom

By

Our modern celebration of Mother's Day began with the efforts of Anna Marie Jarvis during the early 20th century. As a young girl, Anna overhead her mother praying for a "memorial day for mothers." Anna never forgot that prayer and after her mother's death in 1905, she set out to honor her mother (and mothers everywhere) with a special day. In ... Read more

5 Financial Questions To Ask Before Getting Married

By

No one needs to know you started pinning ideas for the wedding after your second date. Planning is a good thing! Although money matters aren't nearly as fun as picking out the theme, the colors, the cake flavor or the wedding gown, discussing your philosophies on budgeting is just as important as anything else you plan for your married life ahead. An ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Floor

Seduce Your Partner & Improve Your Sex Life!

Improve your sex life with these seduction ideas!

Devil Heart

The Hookup Site POF.com is Banning Hookup Posts?

Founder scratches Intimate Encounters Section of PlentyofFish.com and imposes new age gap limits.

Solution

When Love Goes Wrong – Really Wrong (The Jodi Arias Case)

Notorious murderer Jodi Arias - honest talk about abuse, the death penalty and forgiveness

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS