Life After Death: Starting Over After The Death Of Your Spouse


The end of life for your spouse doesn't mean the end of yours too. How to create life after death

For many of us who have had the privilege of experiencing marriage and sharing our life with someone we love, the majority of us never thought about what we would do when the "til death do us part" clause in our marital vows will becomes reality. What happens when those lovely hands who once held ours every day are suddenly gone from this earth? For many of us, the thought of facing each day without our beloved does feel like our life has ended, even after the worst of the pain of their passing has subsided.

But does the death of our spouse have to mean the death of ourselves, too?

One thing I learned from my grandfather is you're never too old to get married. We lost my grandmother on Mother's Day when I was 10. My grandpa was 70 years old. Within a year and a half, he was remarried. He got back on the horse and married a woman he worked with for many years at the post office who had been a long time friend of both he and my grandmother. His new wife was also a widow. This remarriage helped ease the pain of the loss and provided great companionship for them both.

If you have lost your spouse, even if it's at a young age, it's important to know there is life after the death of your spouse. Whether you're 46 or 85, you're never too old to start over or spend your time exploring things you've always wanted to do. After you've spent some time grieving the loss of your loved one and wonder what's next, here are some ideas of what to do with your life after the death of your spouse:

Reinvent yourself Get a new haircut, a makeover, explore parts of your personality you perhaps have neglected over time.

Get involved Getting involved in social activities and community organizations can help you discover a sense of meaning in your life which in turn helps keep you healthy, active and living.

Travel Take the opportunity to take that vacation you've always wanted, travel abroad, have the experience of a lifetime.

Spend time with family Visit relatives you haven't been able to see much of over the years, spend time with children or grandchildren.

Explore your hobbies Been dying to learn how to paint or play the cello? How about take tennis lessons?

Remarry Studies show that people over a certain age will die within 3 years of the passing of their spouse if they do not go on to remarry or maintain an active lifestyle. Marriage to another after being with the love of your life may seem like a stretch, but open yourself to the possibility. Even if you're retired and feel you're too old for love, I'm here to tell you, you're not. Spending quality time with another person helps lessen the feelings of loneliness and helps bring meaning and purpose to your life, all qualities necessary to keep us feeling young and alive.

A new relationship isn't meant to replace the memory of your beloved, and it doesn't mean that what you had wasn't special. It simply means you haven't given up on love and want to spend your life with a companion. It's perfectly natural no matter what age you're at. And remarriage even in the retirement years has many health perks and helps keep seniors active and from feeling lonely.

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