How avoiding these three types of guys could save you from some bad experiences.
2. The Terminal Bachelor
The terminal bachelor can be identified in several ways:
- He is over 45 and has never been married.
- He has children with one or more women to whom he was never married.
- He states he does not believe in marriage.
The terminal bachelor fits one or more of the above criteria. Another important identifying trait is that he does not respect women. That is a bit more tricky to suss out but it is highly important nonetheless.
Some identifying signs that a man doesn't respect women are that he has a strong interest in pornography, enjoys sexist jokes, tends to forward emails and blog about porn and participates in sharing sexist jokes. A major facet of Western society tells us that it is normal for guys to like porn and sexist jokes but is that really the kind of man with whom you want to enter into a deep, spiritual, passionate partnership? I didn’t think so!
The terminal bachelor is still a human being who may display some of his vulnerability to you. He will put his most sensitive foot forward so you will like him, approve of him and typically also so you will have sex with him (hopefully repeatedly). For the terminal bachelor, a girlfriend = regular sex. He probably enjoys the companionship, too, but the sex is a big draw. A relationship with the terminal bachelor usually includes settling for a less spiritual connection than you crave. Skip it and choose yourself; wait for the real thing. 5 Tips To Bounce Back From A Breakup
3. The Cheater AKA The Low Self-Esteemer
The cheater. Is he a sex addict? Possibly. He may seem wonderful, handsome, funny, charming, sensitive. If he tells you he has cheated on every girlfriend prior to you, he will do it again. No, you aren't different. He has something wrong internally and you can't fix it.
The cheater will display pride in his "conquests." He may be sly about it or obvious as the cheater type comes in many forms.
- He may be the aloof, alpha male, like a captain of a sports team.
- He may be seemingly sensitive. Do not mistake a tendency to be a stoner with sensitivity, mellowness or spiritualness. If it is pot induced, it is not authentic.
- He may be shy. He thinks he doesn't get many dates. He feels you are a major conquest and, right or not, it feeds your ego. When he has the opportunity to acquire another conquest, however, he will take it.
The cheater could also be called the "low self-esteemer. He has low self esteem, even if in some cases he has a big ego and seems arrogant. Don't be fooled; the cheater is a little boy on the inside who doesn't feel good about himself. He seeks outside of himself for validation of his worthiness, attractiveness and sexual prowess. He is addicted to that validation and will always be that way unless he goes through significant psychotherapy, usually for a period of years. My advice: just don't go there. 7 Dos & Don'ts For Dating Success
This article was originally published at Amy Leigh Mercree The Spiritual Girl's Guide. Reprinted with permission from the author.