Sexuality is about as spiritual as it gets. Let’s look at why.
Orgasm and pleasure are important. They are necessary to live in this mad world. They are our birthright in a way that is bigger than sex and a hedonistic idea of pleasure—although I think hedonism is perfectly fine. But pleasure is so much bigger than that.
Pleasure and orgasm get talked about as if they are extraneous, indulgent and as something we should downplay. They get talked about like they are not spiritual. A lot of people are walking around thinking like this. This is madness! This is the disconnect that keeps us shut down.
Sexuality is about as spiritual as it gets. Let's look at why.
Many people see the spiritual path as intrinsically being able to absolve oneself of this world, to transcend the physical. But Spirit/God/Goddess/ Universe/Universal Energy/whatever you call it put us here on earth, not somewhere in the ether.
The most spiritual thing we can do is learn to live here in the human physical world and love the people we are with, which means loving ourselves and fully enjoying all that life on earth offers.
We have got to make sex a priority and not treat it like a luxury. It's not a luxury. It is absolutely important and part of the energy that propels us forward in life. As we are tapped into our sexual energy, we are able to create and to move the things we want to move in our lives.
Orgasm and pleasure connect us to our unique core selves, and to all of the love in the world. The universal love. It's all right there at our fingertips. It's a well-spring we have to tap and pump and then we are in the flow with life and all of the energy of life fully lived.
We have been given the amazing power of our senses and we are meant to use them, to understand them, to commune with this natural world. We were given a phenomenal body capable of ecstatic pleasure and we are meant to experience it and enjoy it.
Yet most people are holding back, stopping themselves from feeling too much, from going to the depths.
Many people do not think they deserve pleasure or good things, so they are not able to receive pleasure. You have to take it! It's being given to you! Take it, and enjoy it.
For someone to try to give you an amazing gift that you want and for you to keep your hand closed and refuse to take it—that is offensive. It's withholding, in fact—it's you closing yourself to life itself.
And it makes other people sad when they try to give to you and you refuse to receive it. The joy of giving and the joy of receiving go hand in hand.
What would it be like if you allowed yourself to truly receive, without qualification, without apology, without justification—if you just surrendered to the depths? We are here for those depths. We are here to push our limits, to explore what we are capable of.
When we connect to our deepest sexual ecstasy, we blur the lines between the physical and the spiritual world and they become one. That is the spiritual path. Sexuality and pleasure are both paths to the divine.
They are paths to our deepest selves and our deepest longings. Why are we holding back? We are holding back on life. We are refusing to put on our oxygen mask and suck. We are containing ourselves when we are meant to expand and be HUGE. We are limiting the possibilities of our experience.
Here is my call to action this week for you: allow yourself to truly receive, in a conscious, deliberate way, something each day.
This could look like:
- Closing your eyes and breathing in deeply once a day, allowing yourself to receive the ever-available abundance of air.
- Giving yourself as sexy masturbate to celebrate May as Masturbation Month—make the room sexy, draw a bath, put on your favorite music, pull out the toys, indulge in the erotica, whatever gets you hot.
- Buying yourself fresh flowers.
- Savoring your food with intention and gratitude. Eat with consciousness.
- Taking time to mindfully apply lotion after your shower or bath instead of just slapping it on and heading out the door—really take a moment to let yourself receive your own touch.
- Asking for help with something you don't normally ask for help with.
The possibilities are limitless and I'd love to hear how YOU practice receiving this week!
And if you’d like to connect deeper to your pleasure and orgasm, I’d love for you to join me for my upcoming virtual workshop “You’re NOT Taking Too Long: How to surrender to pleasure AND get what you want in sex.” I hope to see you there!