Virginity pledges. People are still making them, but very few are keeping them. So what gives? A recent study indicates that people who take virginity pledges are just as likely to have sex, unless they are extremely religious. (Read the study here).
So why are people making them to begin with? What's a better way to promote safe sex than making an unrealistic pledge?
1) Pressure from family, friends, community. This is perhaps the biggest influence behind a persons decision to take a virginity pledge. When the pressure is coming from parents or a community, it's easy for a person to take the pledge. But not as easy to keep it. Before taking a virginity pledge (or making any other decision affecting your life, health or sexuality), it's important to remember that it's your body and your rules. What you decide to do or not do behind closed doors is no one else's business.
2) Safe sex is a better option. If taking a virginity pledge isn't up your alley or you have no intention of keeping the pledge, it's important to practice safe sex. Figure out what method of safe sex works best for you and stick to your guns. It's possible to have a healthy, fun sex life without putting yourself at risk for disease or unwanted pregnancy.
3) Communicate your stance with potential partners. This is the most important aspect of any relationship, communication. Let's say you're someone who likes to take things slow and dosen't want to jump into bed right away. Communicate that with your partner upfront so they can respect your boundaries. It's equally as important to also have the monogamy talk. Many people don't want to have sex unless they're in a monogamous relationship. Always talk about this before jumping in bed with someone, rather than assume sex will make it official.
Alexander Greenberg, founder of PriceDate.com, said, "Sex is a topic that should be discussed between two people when they're ready. It shouldn't be expected or dictated by outside forces." PriceDate is a new auction based dating platform that forbids sex on a first date to allow people to get to know each other first.
If a virginity pledge is something that really aligns with your belief, more power to you. But if your choice is swayed by peer pressure, consider exploring an alternative option to happy, healthy and safe sex life.
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