3. The side-chick rarely becomes the long-term girlfriend. Once you allow yourself to be relegated to the role of a man's "mistress," "woman-on-the-side," "jumpoff" or "booty call," there is a 99 percent chance you will never be upgraded to the role of "wife" or "long-term girlfriend." I just had this discussion with a female friend recently. There are a number of women who naively think if they start out as a man's "sexual play toy," sooner or later they will earn the right to be "upgraded" to that man's wife, or long-term romantic partner. That is highly doubtful ... not impossible, but extremely rare.
As a woman, you must familiarize yourself with what is known as the "Madonna-Whore Complex." I always tell women that understanding this concept first developed by legendary psychologist Dr. Sigmund Freud is the absolute first step to understanding why many men choose some women as long-term monogamous sex partners while interacting with other women only as short-term non-monogamous sex partners. Without getting too lengthy here, I will give you the very short-version: Most men want to date and marry women who remind them of their mothers. I cannot tell you how many men I know right now who are married or involved in a long-term relationship with a woman who has one or more similar attributes to that man's mother. If you remind a man of his mother, to one degree or another, that is when his conscious or subconscious mind places you in the category of "girlfriend" or "wife" material.
More from YourTango: Are You Fit to be Someone's Husband or Wife?
If the primary quality that stands out about you is your sex appeal and nothing else, then nine times out of ten, that man is only going to look at you as "casual sex" material. If it is truly your desire as a woman to be a man's future wife or girlfriend, then the worst thing you can do is start off being that man's "mistress" or "woman-on-the-side" while he is currently involved with someone else. You automatically lose respect in that man's eyes. The chances of him ever upgrading you to the status of his number-one romantic companion are less than one percent.
More from YourTango: Women Should Always be Initiators, Reciprocators, or Rejecters