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How Do You Want to Feel Inside Your Relationship?

Heartbreak, Love

Have you ever been with a man who leaves you always feeling like you need more from him?

Have you ever been enamored with a man you find handsome and powerful, but who leaves you always feeling like you need more from him?

Have you ever found yourself constantly walking on eggshells around your man because he gets easily upset by things?

Have you ever fantasized about what your future babies together would look like, but the guy you’re seeing has never talked about your future together?

Do you wonder what he’s up to when he’s not right in front of you?

So many times when I was dating and seeking relationship, I would find myself hung up on one guy or another. I had determined at some point that this–THIS–was the guy I wanted to be WITH. Somehow, I’d gotten hooked. Sometimes, it was how good looking he was. Other times, because I imagined we’d just “make a great couple.” Of course, the chemistry was always there for me too.

But was I really clear on what I wanted back then?

Make sure you ask yourself this: What is it you’re looking for in relationship, exactly?

When looking, we often aren’t clear as to what we REALLY want.

It’s easy to list off all the attributes you think you want in a person (height, similar interests, intellect, humor, etc) but have you ever asked yourself how you want to FEEL inside a relationship?

It’s a good question, right?

Sure, it’s easy to determine someone’s likeability based on looks or career choice. Perhaps after you meet that person, you may decide you like him because he’s also funny and smart. You may even have some things in common.

But beyond that, have you thought about how it feels to be in a relationship with him? Does he call you often enough? Does he make dates with you and keep them? Does he talk about and plan the future with you in it?

If you can answer NO to any of those questions, you need to ask yourself: How does that make you feel?

Do you find yourself always checking your phone for a text from him? Did you hold open your weekend plans for him, but now it’s Friday and you haven’t heard from him yet? How does that leave you feeling?

By NOT putting all your eggs in one basket and investing all your hopes and dreams of a future relationship into one man who isn’t up to the task, you can better assess your feelings around all potential partners. Wouldn’t this put you in a better position to choose your life partner?

How you feel in a man’s presence is more important than anything else in your relationship. And this includes when you’re NOT in his presence.

Hopefully, you always feel good inside your relationship. If you don’t, maybe it’s time to look around a little.

Adi Cecile is a Wellbeing and Dating & Relationship coach who hosts workshops in New Orleans for women struggling in their quests to discover the relationships they've always wanted. To sign up for a free consultation, and discover whether she is a good fit for your individual dating and relationship needs, visit

This article was originally published at Keep Your Well Being in Dating & Relationship with Adi Cecile. Reprinted with permission from the author.


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