Once, you were inseparable. Your days didn't feel complete without hearing his voice or seeing his face. He made you feel special and loved. Then the relationship came crashing to an end. Whether you called it quits or he did, you never expected to be in this place. The joint future you envisioned is kaput.
It's natural to grieve when a love relationship ends. This person was special to you. Just as with a death, there can be an enormous sense of loss, longing and regret after breaking up. Take it from your personal "Breakup Whisperer," many of us move on too soon resulting in what I diagnose as "Post Traumatic Love Disorder." When we move forward before we've healed from a past relationship we can end up feeling shattered and displaced.
This is not to say you should be crying alone in a room until you're over it. However, you should give yourself a moment to mentally cleanse. When you're with someone, exchanging DNA and spending quality time, you can be energetically corded to them. Going from relationship to relationship without a moment to catch your breath can be a sign of love addiction.
So, how do you know when you're truly over your ex? Counting backwards ...
5. You feel flirty again. When we're depressed the world looks like 100 shades of gray and no, not in a good way. Then, when we are on our way to healing we experience rebirth. It's like things are coming back into technicolor. Many of my coaching clients describe the feeling of coming out of a breakdown that they weren't aware they'd experienced. That said, there's nothing like a little rebound loving to relight your spark. Be open to introductions.
4. You are telling a different story. "He did this, then I said that." After a heartbreak our edition of what happened becomes our favorite thing to talk about. It's easy to fall into a sense of victimization, especially if a betrayal like infidelity is involved. When your default mode is no longer, "Let me tell you what happened to me ... " you might be getting over your ex. Keep reading ...
More breakup advice from YourTango:
- Relationship In Limbo? Use The Breakup Formula [VIDEO]
- 5 Breakup Myths That Are Total BS
- 10 Tips For Surviving A Breakup