I BelieveTherapy should challenge, not threaten, you. And you should experience the changes you seek, not just talk about them. If you are still talking about what you want to see different in your life, let's get to work. We'll identify the tools you need and evaluate them as we move along. You will find that I work from a place of mindfulness: in the present moment, aware, & non-judgmental.
I have been in practice since 1993, private practice since 1995. I also led groups at The Wellness Community of Southwest Florida for about 10 years. I am fortunate that my passion and my competence intersect when facilitating the interactions of couples as they take the risk of getting closer to each other, and when working with individuals who seek to transcend the challenges of cancer, depression, anxiety or other life challenges. Why a mindfulness-based, Cognitive Therapy approach? The science on the benefits of emotional regulation is clear. When our emotions are in turmoil, our higher brain centers go off line. Mindfulness practice gives us the tools to move from an emotionally chaotic state to one that we have control over. Cognitive Therapy practices are proven to work well with depression and anxiety, but only when you have control over your higher brain centers. This control consists of two equally important qualities: 1) that you are able to tolerate strong emotions, so that you don't fall into "fight, flight or freeze," and 2) that you are able to attend to your thoughts as they are happening, so that you can stop and change any rumination that increases your difficult emotional states.
Put on your "Big Ears"
Two friends of mine were given a set of fluffy stuffed bunnies with big floppy ears as a wedding gift. They have provided the language of this metaphor, which is especially useful when you & your partner are engaging in a conversation that both might find difficult, due to delicate feelings or because you're each invested in the issue.) One day when they were getting into a conversation which was triggering issues for both of them, Lonnie picked up one of the bunnies, handed it to Kate, and said,"I need to you to listen to me like this bunny: silently, and with big ears." When starting such a conversation now, one of my friends will say to the other, "I need you to put the Big Ears on," and the other knows exactly how to act. Money conversations are often these kinds of conversations. If you are stressed about finances, and you know that your partner is also stressed about finances, you want to make room for your partner to express his or her thoughts and concerns without triggering yours. So s/he knows that when you ask her/him to put the Big Ears on, s/he'll help you by listening, and responding to any concerns or queries you have dispassionately. Once you've gotten the clarity or relief you need, then you give her/him space to process anything that conversation brought up for your partner. You take your turn with "the Big Ears," and each gets their own individual time to explore something with much less stress.