Hold Me Tight Weekend Retreat Based on the best selling book by Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love." We all need acceptance, belonging, comfort and safety with our spouse or life-long partner. We want a positive answer to the key questions in love relationships: Are you there for me?” “Do I matter to you?” “Am I enough?”
We live in a world where most people feel under-valued, overworked, and disrespected on at least some level and you can use this fact to your distinct advantage where your love relationship is concerned. Nagging calls up negative emotions and ultimately busts up more relationships than porn or cheating ever could.
As women, it is crucial to be surrounded by beauty. It’s also a sign of auspiciousness. Your environment ‘talks’ to you on a daily basis, subtly influencing your perceptions of reality. Women tend to be more sensitive to their environments whether they’re conscious of it or not. Therefore, it is mandatory for you to program your environment to tell you the truth about who you are instead of allowing it to repeat negative habits or patterns.
End your pattern by becoming aware. Uber aware. Know what triggers your pattern (e.g., what tips off that nightly conversation) so you can stop the cycle before it starts running without your permission. Then decide how you want to act instead. What's your ideal state if your pattern didn't exist? Consciously replace your patterned response with an action that matches how you want things to look.
Can you remember what was going on in your life from birth to about six years old? Probably not, but rest assured you were doing something that affects you deeply to this very day: forming your attachment style. We form our attachment styles early based on the availability and responsiveness of our parents. When we're young, if our needs are met in a warm, loving, stable environment, then we have a better chance of growing into adults who can attach to others in healthy ways. If our need for support and reassurance was not met, it can lead to problems attaching to others and forging healthy relationships later in life.
When you look at the millions of profiles on Match.com or eHarmony or OKCupid.com or any of the websites out there attempting to match you up with the person of your dreams, what do you see? Is there anything in the profile that stands out, that helps you feel as if you can really "see" that person?
Are you trying to push on a closed door that won’t open? Let me explain what I mean. There have been a number of times in my life and in the lives of my clients that we want something to happen so badly, that we just keep trying and trying and trying to make “IT” happen… to no avail. It really makes no difference what the IT is. It can be finding your ideal partner, starting your new business, or even loving yourself. Sometimes it feels the harder you try the faster your objective slips away!
This is the first in a series of articles sharing my 5 Keys to Finding Hope and Finding Him. The 5 Keys are: M - Me and Me first. A - Assess your list. S - Shed your stuff. T - Time to get out and Trail blaze. R - Real women find their man. A single man I know once said, “If a woman doesn’t seem to love herself, why should I love her?”
Nice has become the new four letter word for many women. They associate “nice” men with having qualities such as boring, passive, and unromantic. I’m not sure how this happened. My guess is that it is part related to how the media portrays “strong” versus “weak” men and part related to our biology—women neurologically look for traits in men that will ensure that their offspring will have good genes, be provided for and protected.