Out with the old, in with the new ... that's what the new year is all about, right? So, once you've purged your toxic relationship habits in 2012, it's time to embrace some new, healthy ones in 2013.
For the New Year I decided I was going to give up drinking, smoking and carrying on, a term affectionately used by my bandmates. And, I thought, why wait until New Years? Why not get a head start? I had hit my version of rock bottom recently, which I've been told is "lucky." That night, I got to having a few drinks with some girlfriends and the next thing I knew two of the girls I was with broke out into a fist fight. Yes, it was pretty violent and aggressive.
Are you in a relationship where you feel an accumulation of little hurts, not one big hurt but many little ones? Notice how the little hurts build slowly. Relationship intimacy builds with every caring, sensitive and open communication. And it is quite fragile, requiring consistent nurturing. On the 1st day of loving my true love hurt my feelings. He arrived an hour late.
For many people, the holidays are a time to expect much, and receive little. Or the opposite; it is a time to receive a lot and get little of what they really want. Many of us get fed up with the commercialization of Christmas, and get frustrated spending money trying to find the perfect gifts for those who already have too much.
Continuing to idealize and romanticize "the one" keeps you living in the past, making it extremely difficult to move forward. If you're asking, "Why didn't my relationship work out with him?" the simple yet hard-to-understand answer is that every person comes into your love life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
Do you have bad relationship habits? Of course you do. Who doesn't? That's why we asked over 100 YourTango Experts the following question: "What are the most effective ways to overcome toxic relationship habits?"
This coach recommends you stop chasing. That is the only way you will know if your intended has the same level of interest (and focus) as you do in finding love.
I’m the first to admit I have some strong opinions, some of which have been wildly popular, and others absolutely not. That could be because we have been indoctrinated into a modicum of agreement on what’s polite, etiquette or even appropriate when it comes to giving unsolicited advice. Or (my suspicion is) we are simply afraid of the truth. However you look at it, the consequences for such straight talk can be stringent; tribal ostracization, social paralysis or, worse, no one likes you and you die alone.
So you want to lose weight and you're thinking that another New Year's Resolution is the way to go? Perhaps you've already gained the expected 10 pounds of Holiday Weight Gain and you almost can't wait for January 1! However you've had enough experience with this by now that you already know New Year's Resolutions are broken within two weeks, at the most. Most don't last beyond 3 days.
Are you looking for the perfect intimate New Year’s activity for you and your significant-other? Look no further. This 4-Step activity I’m outlining below can be used for either personal reflection, as a group activity on New Year’s Eve, or for an open and intimate conversation with that special person in your life. For best results, I recommend going through this process alone the first time before sharing your responses with others.