This is the second installment in a 2-part article series about struggles with intimacy that are relatively common in gay relationships. In Part 1 of the series, "intimacy freak-out" was defined and the reasons why gay men are prone to this phenomenon were discussed.
Your “Soul Mate” is her husband. With technology we are all connected all the time. We can skype, text and talk to people anywhere in the world. It is amazing that with all of this technology our relationships have not gotten smarter. In fact, we are still trying to date married people. Married people posing as possible dates on social networks are as common as pollen in the spring. Every week I hear at least one story from someone who believes they have found their soul mate in a married man or woman they met online.
More often than not, it really does feel like men and women are from different planets. Women love to talk and share their feelings, while men prefer to think about things and solve their own problems. A women's brain is wired to use speech as a main form of expression, which can drive a man crazy when she is listing a series of problems, which helps clear her head and make her feel better that someone is listening. A man on the other hand, can enjoy a quiet drink after work mulling over his problems in his head.
More often than not, it really does feel like men and women are from different planets. Women love to talk and share their feelings, while men prefer to think about things and solve their own problems. A women's brain is wired to use speech as a main form of expression, which can drive a man crazy when she is listing a series of problems, which helps clear her head and feel better that someone is listening. A man on the other hand, can enjoy a quiet drink after work mulling over his problems in his head.
This month’s Harvard Business Review is The Failure Issue: How we handle failure, learn from it, get over it. Given the economy right now, I figured it was a chance to learn from the experts. What could they tell us about relationships and marriage, I wondered.
Sex and sexual expression are learned. But, one thing that you will learn is that doing what feels good is inherent and biologically determined. In other words we innately know what feels good based on our biology. But, we must learn to feel comfortable enough to explore and express it.
If you’re looking at a tiled ceiling or floor and one tile is missing, your eye will be drawn to that missing tile, and you’ll continue to focus on that missing tile rather than the rest of the tiles. Dennis Prager, author of Happiness is a Serious Problem, calls this the “Missing Tile Syndrome” and says it explains why many of us focus on what is missing in our lives instead of what we have. This tendency causes us much unhappiness. Let me explain.
What if you could create anything you want? Anything? YES ANYTHING! You would have a super life wouldn't you? Well my friendly readers, I am here to tell you right here and right now that there is a blank canvas in front of you; and you can paint anything that you want on it. Want a great relationship? Then paint it. Want more money? Then Paint it. Want more happiness, yeah I know you got it by now. :).
Life isn't perfect. I'm fairly certain it isn't meant to be. There can be aspects that are works in progress and areas where we're growing and learning. But if overall you can't say that you love your life, it is time to start asking why not.
Infidelity: Is Divorce always the result? “Wow, if Sandra Bullock is cheated on what hope is there for the rest of us” (Overheard a 22 year old girl talking to her girlfriend).