A women wrote to me with the following: I am in relation for last 4 years. He loves me, cares about me, and says he wants to spend his whole life with me. But he is not ready to get engaged and that kills me. I have tried alot to change his mind but I’ve failed. He says he still needs time. If he loves me then what’s the reason stoping him from engagement? Here’s my response to her and any woman who is trying to push a man into marriage:
Xena: "I let my fear and hatred blind me to everything." Gabrielle: "Sometimes the past can do that. Xena, if I had been through what you've been through…" Xena: "No. No! You understand hatred but you've never given into it. You don't know how much I love that." Excerpt from "The Price," a second season episode of "Xena: Warrior Princess."
Whether you have been married for decades or you are recently starting a life together as a couple, how you handle difficulties in your marriage can mean the difference between a happy, safe, and intimate relationship and a frustratingly distant one. William Glasser, MD, creator of Choice Theory, says that when we are unhappy with our situation, we attempt to change it by looking outside of ourselves to seek the cause of our troubles. In practical terms, way too often we look for the culprit in our spouse.
Marriage is a process in which two unrelated people get together to build a life apart from the people they grew up with. It's understandable that these two people may have little to no experience or skills in the art of being married.
Don’t talk so much! I know that this sounds insensitive and politically incorrect. I know that psychologists and couples counselors such as myself are supposed to push “communication” as the key to a better relationship. AND, I’m here to tell you the truth or at least MY TRUTH. This post is specifically for women in heterosexual relationships. While I’ve worked with many gay and lesbian couples over the last twenty years, I’m not sure if this perspective applies to their relationship dynamics. I’d love feedback though.
I came across a great vlog (video blog, for those of you like me who have no clue about these things) today. It was from modern day matchmaker and relationship coach, Paul Carrick Brunson and he was sharing what he sees as the number one issue keeping singles from meeting that someone special. Turns out we are all walking around with sourpuss faces and turning off potential suitors left and right.
The holidays can be a stressful time of year for many people. Often you are juggling shopping, traveling, visiting and entertaining. For many of you, the most stressful part of the holidays is family gift giving. Here are some suggestions to ease your stress: Key questions to ask yourself:
Considered the breakup season, the holiday season can also be the best time of the year to find love. According to David McCandless, a British journalist, the first two weeks of December are peak times for breakups. However, this should be no reason to miss out on opportunities for a great love connection. There are 3 qualities that will enable you to quickly bounce back from a breakup, or meet quality candidates if you are a happy single. You must be prepared, pro-active and creative.
Can more sex help neurotic couples be happier?
Do you sometimes wonder what happened to that randy, can't-get-enough couple you used to be? You know, before the fatigue of everyday life set in and before the kids arrived. Back when you could have the week from hell and still strap on your dancing' shoes and, after a great night out, have energy for sex. If you just sighed nostalgically, I get it. I understand how easy it is to let the demands of everyday life take precedence over romance. I know how easy it is to find yourselves, on what used to be date night, in sweats, watching a Netflix, eating delivery pizza, and drifting off before the end of the movie. Been there. Done that.