The time before, during and after a break is excruciating. Your mind dwells constantly on your ex, keeping you locked into feelings of sadness, despair and anger. Replaying the series of events keeps you in the past and unable to see a bright future. Break the cycle of replay by becoming aware of the moment you start thinking about your ex.
Make Your Home the “Go-To House” Encourage Positive Friendships © Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke—http://www.judyhwright.com As parents and caregivers (lots of Aunties and Uncles out there) we want to encourage positive friendships with the children we love. We also like an orderly house and a minimum of noise and confusion in our house. Sometimes we have to let go of dreams of having neat homes and go with comfortable and inviting.
A reporter asked me to help him with his column the other day, and his first question was: “Valentine’s Day is coming up. But where can you meet someone if you’re single?” I replied, “That's like asking me where to go eat when you're hungry. First you need to tell me what you like, what you are hungry for? I certainly wouldn't want to send you to a seafood restaurant if you can’t stand fish! As elementary as it sounds, we need to make this distinction and move away from the one-size-fits-all relationship mentality.
"We can't seem to connect anymore." This is one of the most common complaints I hear in my counseling practice. We all know that it is generally easy to connect at the beginning of a relationship - before all the protections and defenses come up. But what do you do to reconnect once you feel disconnected from each other?
Unrealistic expectations can cause a great deal of emotional pain if you are alone on Valentine’s Day! Longing for what is not there in front of you rather than seeking joy in what is! I often think of the old saying, “God never gives you more than you can handle.” There is great truth in this even when it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Inch by inch you move forward with conscious intent until you can see light at the end of the tunnel. You have survived! Now what?
I read a rather scathing article yesterday in the UK's Guardian newspaper on the pitfalls of online dating. As a long-term professional in the industry - and as someone who met their current SO online - I really wanted to write a positive post today about finding love on the 'net. Interestingly, the crux of this piece was the assertion that you can fall for the 'details' of someone's online persona - their interests, their physical apperance, their political beliefs - but those details don't tell you anything about the man/woman behind the profile.
Every human tells lies and they lie to save themselves. Unless you are being tortured or threatened that someone will take your life or someone’s life you love, lies are a way to help us feel less guilty, less embarrassed, less responsible for what we did, or vindicated for what we failed to do. When someone is lying to you there is only one person who should be defensive or worried, and that’s the liar. If you are receiving the lie then stepping back, being curious, and detaching are important so you don’t become the person who is out of control.
Sometimes, when relationships end, we feel a source of emptiness in our hearts. As if a death has occurred, we may even feel that we have lost a part of ourselves. This feeling is real and needs to be addressed in a positive way! When your heart is broken, your whole identity may feel shattered. You may feel you are no longer alive. But that is not the case. A breakup is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself trying to fix it. It may be time to move on, and reclaim your life.
Here's a hard truth; are you ready? There are parts of you that guarantee you will never get what you want most. Ever said something like, "Part of me is ready to move on from my ex, but part of me can’t stop obsessing about him or her," or “Part of me is ready for a great relationship, but part of me thinks I don't deserve it yet?” If so, it's because you actually have a lot of "Parts" inside you. Some that are designed to get you what you want most, and others that are designed to stop you from getting those things. You’ve got a myriad of Parts within you. Parts are like worker bees to your queen bee. Each Part works diligently for you, yet each one carries out a differing intention or belief of yours and thus they can be at odds with each other. This very human phenomenon is called a “Parts Conflict.”
If only "washing a man out of our hair" were as simple as a wash, rinse and repeat cycle. In reality, breaking off attachment to an ex is hard—but not impossible—work. Here are 10 easy-to-follow tips for washing a hard-to-forget ex from your life: 1. Indulge In A "Pity Diet"