Question: “I seem to only be attracted to emotionally unavailable men who resist commitment. I date them then break it off because it’s unhealthy. How do I end this repeating pattern? ” - A.K, Vancouver BC Answer: Thanks for writing in A.K.! I know it’s SO frustrating to have those pesky patterns you can’t seem to shake on your own. No matter what book you read or advice from friends – nothing seems to work, right?
When someone cheats on you it’s like your whole world has crashed down on you. It’s hard to get up and continue on with your life. It’s possible though, you just need to know how to do it. Understanding how to help yourself will get you back on your feet and feeling stronger in no time. Step #1: Allow Yourself to Feel the Pain
When you think back on your past few New Year’s resolutions, what have they been? Most people typically focus on self improvements: losing weight, time management, quitting bad habits, etc. While these are important, don’t forget to put some thought into positive change for your relationship.
By Laurie Mintz, Ph.D . for GalTime.com Teaching your husband to be good in bed is similar to teaching a teenager to drive. You have to know how to drive yourself. To teach your teenager to drive, you need to know where the gas pedal is located and how to push it; to teach your husband to be good in bed, you need to know where your hot button is located and how to turn it on.
By Lisa Basquez for GalTime.com When I first read the book "He's Just Not That Into You" by Greg Behrendt one of the statements he made that stuck out to me (and with me) was his claim that "you are not the exception". The logic is that men generally behave in a predictable way and as much as we women like to make excuses, we should save ourselves the heartache and assume that if a man isn't behaving in certain ways that he just isn't into us.
He seemed attractive enough at first. You had a great first date and you started to think that this could possibly be the one. Imagining that your lonely days are over, you get excited that he texted you right after the date to ask you out again. This is the point where your imagination starts to blur reality and you build up the guy to be the man of your dreams. You tell your friends about your new guy and feel a sudden burst of excitement of the possibility that the search is over.
In our heart of hearts, we always know when a relationship is ending. Sadly, people avoid and ignore the signs – staying in relationships long past their expiry date. Why? Breaking up is painful and people would rather delay dealing with it and avoid feeling the pain for as long as possible.
Relationships are sometimes a tricky balancing act. Whether it be intimate relationships, friendships, family relationships, or work/business relationships it seems that there was never one specific guide we were given to making relationships work. Much of the time, we learned from our parents, and or caregivers by following their lead. Then, we learned from our peers, siblings and eventually our partners by trial and error. Many of us were taught to have manners, to treat people politely, to be nice.
This series is designed to address personal boundaries and help you to identify those that you or someone you know may be having some difficulties with. By identifying boundaries and knowing when they get crossed, we stand a greater chance of protecting ourselves and gaining more fulfilling relationships. Sometimes we focus on meeting someone else’s needs and end up sacrificing our own. By putting limits in place you will find that not only do you feel healthier, but you have also surrounded yourself with others who feel the same!
Today we learned that another celebrity marriage is ending; Katy Perry & Russell Brand will be filing for divorce. It's big news because they're young and famous, because the marriage only lasted 14 months and because they always seemed an unlikely couple. But marriages are ending every day among us, especially as the new year begins. As someone who's never been married, it makes me wonder. Do people get so caught up in the whirlwind romance that they don't think about the idea of lifetime commitment? Or do they go into the marriage thinking, "I hope this works, but good thing for 'irreconcilable differences' in California"?