The polarization of a nation over Sandra Fluke's testimony before Congress on the rights of every woman to have contraceptive insurance coverage has been more than ratings-grabbing rhetoric. While anyone has the freedom to agree or disagree with Fluke's position, the conversation has devolved into personal attacks, sparking major news articles everywhere. Sandra Fluke's very public battle to advocate for women while being personally attacked is a sad commentary on how far we haven't come in this society to protect the voice of women. Rather than cowering or raging, though, we can use this moment to take a look at our own lives...
I am a life and health coach and my blogs tend to focus on fun stuff like vegetables and food labels and how to get out of your own way when you’re trying to lose weight. I never thought I’d wade into anything remotely political, but the recent events involving Georgetown law student, Sandra Fluke have provided such an important lesson, for anyone, about knowing who you are and rejecting other people’s version of you. On a much, much smaller scale, I see this in my coaching practice all the time. Fortunately, none of my clients have been called derogatory names on a national radio show! Have you ever been accused of doing something or being something that just wasn’t true?
The power of fear never ceases to amaze me. When I initially entered the fear forest after my first panic attack at age 21 (three months before graduating from college), I prostrated myself at fear’s feet. I handed over my thought processes and became a complete victim to whatever fear told me was true. For several years, most of this occurred unconsciously as I hadn’t found my way to the right support.
In our day to day lives we experience situations that not only challenge us mentally, but also emotionally and physically. Even those of us who choose to step into the light of the media and play a leadership role that is fueled by our passion and beliefs. We can be subject to challenges and crisis that stretch even our wildest imaginations.
If you’re a smart and successful woman, being professional, in charge, driven and strong are masculine traits that bring you much career success. You’ve been able to reach key goals and objectives and may even have been promoted to positions of greater responsibility. But, if the love you desire has eluded you, the recognition you receive for your hard work can’t make up for what’s most important in life – true love.
If you are wondering if yours is a narcissistic relationship, then there are some signs you cannot ignore: If you can go from being adored to devalued in the blink of an eye just because you had the audacity to question anything your partner, lover, friend or business associate said – look out! If this is the first time you question his/her omnipotence, the attack will be instant and fierce, leaving you with a feeling of having been in the way of a freight train.
I was sitting around this morning and I realized something that really hit me like a ton of bricks: we’re all looking for our soulmates out there. Everyday millions of people are going out on dates hoping and praying that they’ve met “the one” or their soulmate. Everyday people are logging into online dating sites hoping that the new e-mail is from their soulmate.
Many relationships end because of financial problems. In addition, the notion that wealth will make a relationship richer is more likely to be affirmed if you have personally gone through a difficult situation where money was a big issue. But can worldly goods really improve a romantic relationship?
When Chris Brown smashed Rihanna's face up and bit her, there should have been no question about what a child learned from their parent. If you didn't reveal your opinion about her return, your silence is sending a message of acceptance. You have to come down heavy on violence against women being wrong and back it up with supporting actions — like telling your kids no buying Brown's music.
When many people think about love, they may not think that being strong has a lot to do with it. But it does. Or maybe they do think of strength, but in the sense of being strong and protecting yourself from being hurt. The walls that are built to protect are the same walls that keep one from feeling their true feelings. I understand why these walls are built, but it’s a false protection, and doesn’t give one the sense of joy, peace, even security that is often what we really want. You can live strongly without those walls -