Articles by our experts in love, dating, sex and marriage
signs of change in every direction
How has your relationship changed your life?

How Do Relationships Change Us?

A client asked me today, "How do romantic relationships change us?" The idea behind this question is intriguing and may shed light into the darker places of relationships. This question underscores our unspoken fears of loss of control and the need to conform to someone else's ideas about happiness. As a therapist, I tend to see the couples "in trouble" so I may have my own a somewhat stilted view of things.

Don't waste your time waiting for him to call.

Rejected After Sex: What Did You Do Wrong?

So, you met a guy. He seems fantastic. He says all the right words, does all the right things, and you decide to sleep with him a little more quickly than normal because you feel oh-so comfortable around him. Then guess what happens? He stops calling you.

Ask Kim: "Where Can I Find Men?"

Ask Kim: "Where Can I Find Men?"

Question: I’ve been divorced for a couple of years now and I’m ready to start dating. My big problem is where to find men? I’m in my 40’s and don’t want to go to single’s events and the bar scene isn’t my thing– any suggestions? Linda D.

Men, Women & Money

Men, Women & Money

In a recent workshop, one of my participants asked the question: “Who should pay for dinner on a date?” This is not the first time I’ve been asked this question. What is interesting though is that the ONLY students who ask me this are my female participants. However this isn’t surprising if we look at women and money from a historical perspective..

Should we expect monogamy or prepare for the worst?

Does Monogamy Really Work?

It is normal to feel comforted by the thought that our partner is never going to have sex with anyone else but us. Marriage can give us the illusion that our partner is bound by a legal agreement to never cheat. This comes from a long history of marriage as primarily a real estate contract, used purely as a way to perpetuate a name or lineage. But today, with birth control and DNA testing there is no longer a need to use the same harsh outside control. Today we expect to marry not for our names or for property, but for love and for desire.

What Are You Committed To?

What Are You Committed To?

What are YOU committed to? “Love!” “Soulmate Love!” “Lifelong partnership!” “The man of my dreams!” – You may be saying. Many people do. Nobody would SAY “I’m committed to more of the same unfulfilling relationships I’ve had the last ten years.” So why does it keep happening? Because, uhm…how can I say this? Often we’re just full of it. And scared. And Busy. And scared. And… just don’t know any better.

make a choice
How one study can have us taking a second look at our choices.

Abortion & Depression: The Coleman Connection

As the political and psychological war over abortion wages on, learning how to "own" all of our choices as women could not be more vital to ensuring our long term health and peace of mind. In 2009 Priscilla Coleman of Bowling Green State University in Ohio released a controversial study linking abortion and mental health issues.

10 Tips For Talking To Men
Just be yourself and everything else will fall into place!

10 Tips For Talking To Men

If you're a single woman working toward meeting a grown-up, confident and relationship-minded man, a must-have skill is the art of conversation. If your perception is that all a guy does is look you up and down and decide if he wants to ask you out, you're wrong. The "good guys" want to connect somehow if they're going to spend an evening with you. They want to know you'll be fun and open and that the two of you can carry on a conversation. (Just what you want to know, right?)

gay pride
Don't take Kirk Cameron's advice!

How To Ruin Your LGBT Child's Life

Kirk Cameron on CNN's Piers Morgan's show discussing his beliefs that homosexuality is "unnatural" "detrimental" and "ultimately destructive" is just that, ultimately destructive to our GLBT youth. This rejection by the parents and other adult caregivers of our children has a similar effect on a child as the bullying in school that these same kids suffer at the hands of other youth.