This guest article from Psych Central was written by Rick Nauert. Research in time for Valentine’s Day suggests a key indicator for a fulfilling and stable romantic relationship is a partner who recovers from conflict well. University of Minnesota scientists found that if your romantic partner recoups well after the two of you have a spat, you reap the benefits.
Are you ready for true love? On a day filled with everything red ~ hearts, flowers, jewelry boxes ~ what it takes to truly love someone, not just on Valentine's Day, but on the really, really hard days as well is worth consideration. Check out my blog today on my website, "A Very Special Valentine", to read about one of the greatest acts of love.
If things have been dragging along in a stuck or uncertain state and your Beloved has not responded positively to “The Talk”, you may want to put the relationship on probation. This means you will let your partner know that you may be leaving him so that he has a chance to work on things.
This time of year a barrage of pre-packaged, hallmark love wrapped in pink and red cuteness bombards us from every which way, forcing us to stare love in the face. From stuffed bears and singing cards to heart-shaped diamond pendants and 5-course dinner specials ending with a kissing swan soufflé, it can all make you want to bitch slap Cupid in the face if you aren’t coupled up at the moment. But just because you are not IN love right now, doesn’t mean you can’t believe in it.
Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, I am in a bad marriage. We fight all the time and have very little in common any more besides our children. For a long time now, I've thought that we should hang in there for the sake of the children but I'm starting to think that we aren't doing them any favors by doing so. The dread of all the change involved in getting divorced is starting to pale compared to the pain of staying in the marriage.
Valentine’s day is here. Sometimes we assume that if you’ve celebrated one or twenty Valentine’s days with your honey, the preparation will be the same, and you’ll know exactly what your spouse expects. The reality is we may find ourselves year to year still wondering if what we’re doing for our spouse is actually fulfilling or satisfying their needs. You may do and get things for your spouse based on what advertisers say you should do, or what you think you would like if you were in the other’s shoes. But do we really know?
After being on the market for a while or enduring the pattern of one failed relationship after another, you may begin to lose hope that your love life will get better one day. More than improving your looks or your dating missteps, the one element that is critical in attracting the love you want is to believe that there is someone out there for you.
Real love is something invaluable to all of our lives. You cannot know how to express your love, until you know what your partner values. What does love look like to your partner? You may shovel the snow to show love, but if your partner needs to be hugged and told they are more precious than anything else in your life, you could shovel 10 feet of snow and they wouldn’t feel loved. If your partner feels loved when they have a home cooked meal and you pride yourself by saying, “ I love you” every day before you leave for work, but then are too busy to take the time to cook, you may be rejecting them without understanding their withdrawal. You expressed love your way, but not theirs.
Does your score card for Valentine's Day have more losses than wins? Did it start back in grade school when you didn't get as many cards as the other kids? Have you ever been dumped right before the big day? Did you know that more breakups happen in January than any other month?
Now Why Would I Possibly Recommend That You Be A Selfish Lover? BECAUSE the latest research seems to indicate that a selfish lover is more a more satisfying lover to their partner! Yes, it's true, a study from Kwantlen Polytechnic University in Vancouver indicates that: "... as a partner’s sexual self-focus decreased, their partner’s satisfaction decreased."