Puppy. Kitten. Bunny. Just the names we give to pets have connotations of cute, adorable, fluffy, and cuddly. Generally, everyone adores pets, and animal-haters are often categorized with the like of terrorists and murderers. After all, who could ever hate on Lassie?
Despite the fact that plenty of women—maybe even you—have said that "men are dogs," there's no obedience school for guys. But is it possible that the secrets to communicating with men are similar to the secrets of training your dog? Could the Dog Whisperer straighten up your man? No? Maybe? Actually, ladies, YES.
Readers, and imaginary readers, who probably outnumber you, be aware: this will be a blog about cats. If that offends your sensibilities, then move along to more scintillating fare. Cat people, here is my issue: I think I might need to get another cat. I admit, I like cats. I didn't used to, but then I got some. I now have two. The first was adopted hesitantly and largely because of Frank. Her name is Elliott. The second was adopted off Craigslist because I thought that Elliott was lonely—she would mew and demand constant attention. I accidentally ended up with a gigantic, young, creepily smart cat named Ruggles. Elliott still cries and demands attention, except that now she also hates Ruggles. They fight. Like a lot. I come home to find fur stuck to the floor with some indeterminate fluid or kitty litter and blood everywhere. He has gashes all over him from the fighting, fortunately nothing serious, but I swear I'm going to come home one day and find him missing an eye.
Once married, we'd like to think that everyone lives happily ever after, but take a look at the divorce rate. It’s not great. And when a marriage does hit the rocks, splitting one life into two can be a real mess. The latest custody issues? The pets. Namely, the dog, according to newsday.com. In fact, it seems to be enough of an issue that a book was just released on the topic: We Can't Stay Together for the Dogs: Doing What's Best for Your Dog When Your Relationship Breaks Up (TFH Publications, $22.95).
A recent New York Post article profiled a high-profile divorce, the largest arguing point being the couple’s dog. Marsh Newmark has spent $60,000 in a messy battle with his estranged wife, Darynn Zimmer, to gain custody of the former couple’s dog, Rocky. Prior to filing with a Long Island court, Newmark attempted to ’nap Rocky, but the mission failed: “Newmark asked a loyal friend to try to get Rocky back. ‘[Darynn's] boyfriend was walking Rocky — they only walk him for a few minutes — and my friend came up from behind with a leash and tried to unhook one leash and hook the other one on. The boyfriend fell and called out, ‘He's stealing my dog!' The doorman tackled my friend, and the police came.’”
Having a dog is a great way to meet a man. You look approachable and people have a reason to talk to you. But of all deal breakers that exist, pets are one of the toughest. What happens when man meets dog? One author discovers. "I didn't have a dog when I decided to move to New York. But my friends with dogs had long regaled me with tales of companionship, undying devotion, and puppy kisses. I also knew that if you have one, you have to leave your house several times a day, no matter what the weather's like or how you're feeling. What better way to ease myself into a new life in a new city? But as it turns out, introducing your new man to your (old) dog tells you a lot about the man. The other day over lunch I asked a friend if she slept with her dog. 'Of course,' she replied. But what about her new husband? How did he take to sharing the bed? ' don't think I'd ever date a guy who didn't like my dog,' she said firmly."