When divorce occurs, traditions of visiting family leave an unfulfilled emptiness regardless of the busy-ness of your schedule. This time of year is hard on divorced dads, especially those recently divorced. The opportunity to see your kids smiling is at best half as much. Divorce can be like putting on a pair of glasses with dark grey lenses — life turns dull, grim and depressing.
I remember the mental numbness the first time I heard the words. A wave of uncomfortable warmth swept through my body. Who I was, the world I knew, the future I saw was shattered like a picture window hit by a large rock. The words were: “I want a divorce”. That was 2006. Since that time, I’ve pursued a path of spirituality. Not because of the divorce, rather because of one of my person values – evolution. As I look back and reflect upon my divorce, I now know that my divorce was a blessing.
Six months after my husband died, I decided to venture out into the single’s world. I sauntered into a swanky downtown Chicago restaurant with a divorced female friend. She left me perched on a bar stool to go to the restroom. I stared at the glassware on the shelves behind the bar and a guy suddenly appeared, “So when did you get divorced? I replied, “I didn’t get divorced.” He said, “Well where’s your husband?”
By GalTime Lead Ambassador, Yakima/Tri-Cities, Jenny Tiegs, for GalTime.com Divorce is an emotional thing. It's also an expensive thing. Online divorce services promise a simple and quick solution to help couples move on quickly and less expensively. Is it worth it to skip the attorneys and court time and opt for an online divorce instead?
The issues that prevent a rapid adjustment to life after divorce are emotion-based and, as such, cannot be solved logically. All we can do is dissolve the disruptive energy they cause. For example, you got divorced and it's painful. You cannot "solve" the problem of divorce because, regardless of what you do, you are still divorced. The pain is the problem.
What should you know about dating a divorced guy? Is it really THAT much more different than dating a man who has never been married? After all, they're both guys and the bottom line is, they are presently single. It's strange how the "label" of being divorced gets a negative reaction for some people, and that somehow there must have been something "wrong" with the person.
With half of marriages ending in divorce, we wanted to get to the root of the problem. We surveyed over 100 YourTango Experts to find out the top predictors of divorce so that couples can know—in advance of getting married—whether their union is likely to fail.
Much has been studied and written about Empty Nest Syndrome – the emotional impacts on parents/caregivers after children come of age and leave home. But little has been written, researched, or remedied regarding the emotional impacts and resulting psychological trauma on the non-custodial parent as a result of divorce.
Non-Mutual Divorce: I Do... I Don't Micki McWade, LMSW The chances of a husband and wife sitting at the breakfast table and one says "I want a divorce" and the other says "Okay, let's do it," are slim to none. Usually, one person will initiate and the other will resist. The degree of resistance ranges from letting go reluctantly to fighting it all the way.
How many times have you felt blamed by your partner for something that you felt really had nothing to do with you? And how many times have you responded with anger toward the person who triggered you emotionally? While this is normal human behavior, it leads to a loss of trust and intimacy that, over time leads to couples growing apart as they build "protective shields" around their hearts to block the pain of personal attack. There's only so many of these kinds of incidents a person can take before they start to emotionally leave the relationship.
"We're set," my ex shouted. Still lingering in memories, I headed toward the passenger door as if I was going on the trip. But, there was a woman in my seat.
The word “co-parenting” can be a detriment. It is a mushy and loving word, but many people in these situations are not feeling mushy and loving. As a divorced co-parenting teacher and therapist, I often hear comments like: “It is absurd to think that we are ‘co-parenting’-- my ex is a bully and has no interest in compromising and communicating. How do you co-parent with someone who has no interest in co-parenting?”
Marriages will either end in death or divorce. Even picture-perfect marriages have the potential to end in the latter. It can take the smallest thing to spark the idea of divorce; those seemingly innocuous mistakes made at the worst possible moment can undermine a lifetime of love and affection.
Whether you've already started dating after divorce, or you're about to take the plunge, chances are good you're going to be tempted to give in to three behaviors that will sabotage either your ability to move on from your marriage, or seriously reduce the chance you'll find a wonderful new man. Here are three post-divorce dating dangers and how you can avoid them.