Will this Valentine’s Day be a happy one for you? It seems to me that holiday pressure keeps mounting and I’m not sure why. Perhaps as American families become more fractured through divorce and increased geographic distance intimate family celebrations and ritual become less common and cultural ones are filling that gap. A generation ago there was not so much emphasis put on expectations for Valentine’s Day, Mothers and Fathers Day, even Christmas. So what’s going on with Valentine’s Day?
DEATH, LOSS, GRIEF, FAMILY INVOLVEMENT
Grieving can be a confusing process. It’s not as simple as feeling sad, it’s actually a lot of emotions all mixed up. Sorrow, guilt, freedom, anger, fear, relief … these are just a few of the feelings that we may experience. It’s not even as simple as someone dying. We grieve many things in our lifetime. Moving, the death of a pet, retirement, the end of an addiction, a loss of trust and the end of a marriage or a relationship are all moments in which we experience grief.
There are many things expect to experience in our lives, but losing a sibling is not one of them. It certainly wasn't something I thought I would deal with in my lifetime, but low and behold, in December of 1996 I lost my older sister and immediately became part of a club of sibling survivors. Obviously, being new to the club, I didn't understand all that was involved.
“For beautiful eyes look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.” ~ Audrey Hepburn When I read the above quote I reflected on many of my clients who feel deeply isolated and lonely during this season of love. After the death, divorce or break up with a significant other, it is easy to look at your life and feel very alone.
Part of the healing process is experiencing and accepting the feelings that come with loss. The more we deny, block, or escape emotions associated with loss, the greater the negative impact of loss may increase. Common stages people may experience after a loss or breakup include:
When news of a tragedy like the one in Newtown, CT this week hits us, most of us experience sadness, followed sooner or later by anger. This is a normal part of Grief, a complicated emotional process that is associated with a loss. Though most of us have not lost a loved one, we have all experienced a loss in one sense. We have all lost a little of the sense of safety and security we need to carry around with us in order to be able to function and focus on our daily business.
Those of us not directly impacted by the tragic events of this past Friday in Connecticut [although as a human race we are all touched by this loss] cannot begin to know or understand the pain and suffering these devastated people are experiencing. Please do not let this stop you from reaching out as a compassionate, caring and loving friend. Even if you are in doubt then follow Midge’s lead from a wonderfully, comforting book ‘Tear Soup’…"Midge wouldn’t try to talk anyone out of anything anyone was feeling...I don’t know what to say,
It's unthinkable that when you send your child off to school you would ever receieve a call such as those parents in Newtown, CT did on December 14th. It's a parents worst nighmare. My heart aches for those families, as I know everyone's does. As a parent or one who works with children, you may face difficult questions. It is important that you address the topic with your child even if they don't bring it up - they most definitely have heard about it.
Once More for the Children it is not in my realm of understanding to suggest what the children will miss most. that is for only them to say, and they are now silent. And that is the saddest for me. Surely my God has blinked. As sacrilegious as it sounds that is the only rational my human mortal heart will accept. In that blink of my Lord's eye children were taken from our world to his heaven, and with them went their dreams and their realities which were meant to touch us all through the lives that they would live but which now touch our spirits in the silence of their leaving.
My Dad died. There…I said it out loud. Even though I was by his side and saw him take his very last breath, it’s been hard to believe he’s gone forever. F-o-r-e-v-e-r. I wanted to write this article for Thanksgiving so I could publicly thank him and show my gratitude. How trite, I thought. It doesn’t do him justice. So I write now. On a dreary Friday in November. Just another day like every single day since October 2 when I think of him and wish he were here.
This morning, as I was driving around trying to find a gas station that was both open and didn't have a three-hour long line, I started thinking about Hurricane Sandy and the devastation left in her wake. Normally, I only see natural disasters on the news, but this time, I had to look no further than outside the window of my home to witness Sandy's impact first-hand.
Do you belief in omens, signs and premonitions? When it comes to predictions, I always like to say there is a 50/50 chance that things will come true. If something happens we easily attribute it to a sign, when in fact, perhaps it was just a coincidence, usually recognized in hindsight. However, I was intrigued when 3 out of 4 times that I started my car last weekend, Eric Clapton’s Tears from Heaven started just I as turned the key! On the other hand, if nothing happens, we give no importance at all to the sign.
While death and the horror movie go together like candy corn and costumes, this tender little movie brings the love of a boy for his dog and the shock of sudden loss to a new generation of kids and their parents.
I'm Jodie Rodenbaugh and this is my story. It's a story that only I direct. This is my story of feeling stripped of everything I once knew. My experience left me naked and vulnerable, but through that pain, I found strength from a power much greater than myself.
I have been trying my hardest this week to try to think of something interesting I could write about when it comes to dating. But I feel as though I am at a loss for words and everything I have started to write just does not even feel like something I would even want to read about. The reason of why I am at a loss at what to write about is that I am saddened by a loss. One of my favorite residents at my place of work passed away, I knew that one day he would pass away, but that still doesn’t make it easier. This leads me to my topic for this week.