What to do when the past rears its ugly head into the present.
How many times have you found yourself in conversations where someone brings up their painful past? It's the broken record that comes up again and again and all the apologies in the world never seem to make it go away. So why do people do this? And more importantly, what can be done to put the past to rest? Here's what's going on. When a person brings up the past, there is something they want or need in the present. It's evidence of what they need right now. It's a here-and-now problem, not a past problem. That is why apologizing doesn't work.
When you picture Bravo's "Real" Housewives, you likely think of expensive clothes, lavish and over-the-top parties, and a seemingly endless supply of financial backing from their hard-working husbands. But you also picture drama: Not just conflicts between the ladies, but marital issues as well.
Are you enduring pain during sex or avoiding it altogether? Try these tips for pain-free sex.
One of the main complaints that causes couples to seek sex counseling is lack of sex. There are many reasons couples don't enjoy sex anymore. Marital conflict, depression, and stress all affect libido. One of the rarely-discussed but main reasons couples aren't having sex is because it is painful. When a woman talks about painful sex, the first thing a health care worker will think of is prescribing lubricants. This may alleviate the pain, and may cure the problem, but there are many factors that can contribute to painful sex besides dryness.
What you and your partner can do to make the most of couples therapy.
What can you do to improve the chances that couples therapy is worth the time and money you put into it? In other words, what makes marriage counseling work? Of course you need the help of a skilled marriage therapist, but there are several things you can do to help make your marriage counseling a success.
Effective communication achieves better results than nagging. Plus, you'll both be happier.
Gretchen Rubin, author of the brand new book The Happiness Project, has a suggestion for people who want to make their dating lives happier: Quit nagging!
I’m in an uncomfortable situation. I hope there is another way to handle the problem...
Dear Dr. Doris,
I’m in an uncomfortable situation. I hope there is another way to handle the problem other than personally confronting my date.
I met this woman a couple of weeks ago at a party. Things were great until I asked her out to dinner.
That’s when I experienced the shock of my life. She has absolutely terrible
table manners. She talks with food in her mouth and she’s so animated with her fork and knife that I had visions of having a meal with Edward Scissorhands.
It's not that guys are scared to talk about their problems: They just don't feel like it.
Trying to get your guy to tell you what's bothering him? Wondering why he doesn't seem interested in hearing about your horrible day? Don't worry, ladies: It's not that your boyfriend doesn't care or that he's trying to seem strong. According to a new study, it's just that most males think discussing problems is a waste of time.
Levels of conflict stay pretty steady throughout a relationship.
Think you and your betrothed will stop fighting once you tie the knot? Think again. A new study suggests that married couples continue to argue throughout their relationship about as much as they did in the beginning.
Imago can help couples communicate, resolve conflict, and create intimacy
COMMUNICATION USING IMAGO
By Tammy Nelson, PhD
The Imago Dialogue process is a type of communication developed by Harville Hendrix, the bestselling author of Getting the Love You Want, a book about communication and couple’s therapy. The dialogue is a structured technique that you can use to talk to communicate when you are frustrated or just want to feel closer. This dialogue is a wayto talk about conflict in your relationship that lets you each feel heard. To practice the technique, first ask your partner,
When you take responsibility in your relationships, you are being an adult and not a victim.
A 2009 article in O magazine reported on a study conducted at Stanford with over 1500 participants, looking at what differentiated partners in happy, healthy relationships from people who were disappointed and unhappy. The only indicator that had an impact on long-term satisfaction: blaming your partner for problems in the relationship!
