Ever wonder if you can really change your partner? Well, screaming and yelling sure won't do it. In fact, he/she may become resentful. Just as with children, we need to be praised for the good things we do.
It's considered common knowledge that the things people fight over the most are sex and money. Did you know that it's not true? A recent survey conducted by YourTango revealed that the number one reason people fight is because they don't feel appreciated by their partner. Communication issues ranked second. Personally, I think if you don't feel appreciated by your partner, chances are pretty high that you're not communicating well, either.
It seemed so promising in the beginning. They were both passionate about politics. They both felt it was important to engage in activism, to join the public debate. They wanted to be of service to their country. Granted, her education level was higher. He dropped out of college, she went to Law School. But they were both widely read and interested in what was happening, and an increasing number of women are now more educated than their men anyway.
“He never listens to me!” “She only hears what she wants to hear!” “It feels like I'm talking to myself all of the time!” Does it seem like your spouse tunes you out when you're talking to him or her? As clear and straightforward as you think you were with your request, your partner claims to have heard something else from you..or maybe even argues that you didn't say it at all.
Brrrrr When temperatures drop and the weather gets icy and cold, it can be a great excuse to cuddle up with your love in front of a fire or in bed. How delicious to make love with your partner or just spoon under a big cozy blanket! How horrible when you and your partner are locked in conflict or frozen by hard feelings and resentments. When it's cold INSIDE your relationship, there is no fun, no passion and it can feel like there's no love either.
Being pushy usually backfires in a love relationship or marriage. The image of the domineering, controlling man and also that of the harping, "pit bull" woman come to mind when we talk about being pushy. Nobody likes to feel pushed around. Pushiness tends to bring up reactions of defensiveness, emotionally shutting down and outright hostility.
“YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME!” Have you ever felt as if you're talking to a brick wall and you want to (or do) scream these words at your partner? It can be infuriating to have asked your partner to do something and then he or she not only fails to do what you've asked, it's as if you hadn't made the request at all. Your partner might look at you standing there, angry and red-faced, and insist that you didn't say that.
I can’t lie to you. I love technology. I do. The gadgets, the games and the advancements that make our lives so much easier are a dream come true. There is however, no sweet without the bitter and no appreciation without the pain. But before we get to ‘the pain,’ I couldn’t perch myself atop a soapbox, blasting the ramifications of these fantasy items without providing a balanced appraisal of just how wonderful these toys can be.
You may be experiencing "physical intimacy" with a man but are you feeling emotionally close to him? Are you involved with a man you deeply care for but find that you can't get beyond having superficial conversations? Do you wish you could tell him more of what you're thinking and feeling? Are you afraid to talk about things that are important to you because you may scare him away or "burden" him with your thoughts?
Where have all the gentlemen gone? In this video from Fox News iMag, resident "bartender" Tobi Dragotta explores the oft-vexing question of why some men prefer to communicate via short, impersonal bits of text rather than hear someone's voice. How do you get a man to put in some effort and call you?
Oh, I know it can be hard to admit – that we contributed to that awful fight we had with our man, that is. Especially when it’s OBVIOUS he wasn’t listening to us AT ALL – and to top it all off, he had the audacity to use the words ‘overreacting’ and ‘unreasonable’? !
by Aiyana Ma'at The very first time my husband and I decided to enroll in Marriage Education classes I was so clear that there were some “issues” he needed to work on and I was just waiting for his “Aha!” moment to come so he could let go of some of his baggage and stop working my nerves. Yup, that was my thinking— pretty arrogant, right? Well, as each week passed what became clearer and clearer to me was the fact that I might be a bit “touched” too meaning I had some bags I needed to put down myself.
Snapshot: I was three months pregnant with my first child. I was on my knees in front of the toilet bowl, having just thrown up for the sixth time that day. Suddenly, movement at the bathroom door caught my eye. He was standing there. Naked. Touching himself. "Are you done yet?" he asked impatiently. "C'mon baby—let's get it on." Read: Having A Baby Improved My Sex Life My stomach lurched. Tears filled my eyes. "I'll be there in second," I replied looking down. I pulled myself up off the floor, brushed my teeth and proceeded to our bedroom to fulfill my 'wifely duty.'
If it seems like the man in your life is a total mystery, look again. Melinda Clayton reveals that the secret to talking to men is no secret. If you want to understand him, listen, be honest and don't play silly mind games: "In order to communicate effectively, you must first listen to what is being said. Although this sounds simple, it often isn't. Instead of really listening, what we often do is listen just enough to formulate our response. In other words, instead of listening, we're gearing up for battle, looking for the weakness, and planning our strategy. If you want to communicate effectively with a man, listen to what he says, and hear what he means."