If your sex life isn’t what you want it to be, perhaps your emotional intimacy isn’t what it should be. An unshakable, trust-filled, emotional connection is the magic ingredient for off-the-chart sex. Sure, you can have feels-really-good sex with a stranger, but if you want committed-relationship sex that satisfies every sense of your being, emotional intimacy is a gotta have. All couples want emotional intimacy. Problem is, that requires high-level trust which, in turn, requires willing vulnerability. Adults don’t roll that way. We’ve learned, from painful experience, that people who claim to love us can hurt us. The fear of vulnerability is in direct proportion to how much the relationship matters. Therefore, it doesn’t take too many hurts suffered at the hands of your sweetheart before the protective shield is in place and emotional intimacy suffers.
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Great sex is always spontaneous and spur of the moment, right? Wrong. If you and your partner are like most couples, you have a busy life. Work can take up most of your day. Getting home at night can mean more work with home and family. You may not be thinking about sweeping the dirty dishes off of the kitchen table and spontaneously inviting your partner to “Take me NOW!” You’ve heard that you can schedule in sex write it in your calendar, plug it into your BlackBerry. But you’re worried that if sex isn’t spontaneous, it won’t be good sex.
Here's the scoop, we all know that having a passionate, active sex life is a good idea. Apart from the obvious benefits of feeling good and staying connected to your partner, there is a whole slew of health-related benefits involved. Sex burns calories, boosts immunity, reduces stress, improves self-esteem, relieves pain, helps you sleep better and even leads to a younger-looking you. Does it sound like I'm talking about a new pharmaceutical product? I promise, I'm not. All of these health benefits happen naturally when someone has a healthy, active sex life, which is great news. You don't have to pop a pill or see a doctor to have a major impact on your life. According to Dr. Oz, "If you have more than 200 orgasms a year, you can reduce your physiologic age by six years." That's amazing.