In my previous "Marriage Without Monogamy" post, which you might want to take a look at now before reading further, I decided it might be interesting to temporarily steer away from the confessional-style essay this column has become known for. I just wasn't in the appropriate mood, I guess, to work through yet another one of my unconventional relationship issues on paper. And yet judging from some of the very blunt comments this column has inspired in months past, I figured that at least some of my regular readers might be willing to share a few … Read More

Aside from the 14 months I spent working as a music editor for an alt-weekly in Pittsburgh, I've been making my living as a freelance journalist for the past five years. I also work out of a home office – my morning commute never takes more than five or ten seconds – so it was pretty much business as usual when a few weeks ago, I was sitting at my desk and tapping away at my laptop late at night, slowly working through the paces of putting together yet another magazine article.

Before long, I decided to pack it in … Read More

Carrie and I hadn't even been on the highway for an hour when the fighting started. We were in my little Honda Civic hatchback, puttering along I-76 East, en route to Baltimore. She'd been giving me a stone-faced version of the silent treatment, and even though I'd tried everything to get her to open up – begging, pleading, cajoling – I wasn't having any luck whatsoever. Occasionally I would get a sarcastic comment in response, or a mean-spirited laugh.

I almost blame myself for what happened at the rest stop. I was opening the Honda's hatch to look for a … Read More

This is the first conversation I can remember having about my aversion to marriage: I'm in high school - either eleventh or twelfth grade, I can't remember which - and I'm in the laundry room in the basement of my house, talking with my mother.

She's folding something. Brown bath towels, I think. Anyway, the two of us are chatting amicably, as we often do while she's making her daily housekeeping rounds, and somehow we end up on the topic of marriage. "I am absolutely never going to get married," I tell her. "I can't even imagine why I … Read More

One of the very first times I got up enough nerve to talk about my open relationship with a stranger, I was in Turkey, of all places, on a business trip.

I was doing research for a travel guide in the relatively modern town of Antalya, and I'd met a very kind local couple who had asked me out to dinner. They were both my age: late twenties, early thirties. The guy—I don't remember his name, so let's call him Nazim—was Turkish. But his wife was an American from Los Angeles. She had creamy brown skin and dark hair, … Read More

It's a perfectly crisp early evening in the summer of 2007, and Carrie and I are slouching into one of the squishy booths in the back of a dark Pittsburgh pub called Le Mardi Gras. Anyone familiar with the neighborhood will tell you it's a fairly serious alcoholic's bar, mostly because the drinks are strong to the point of being ridiculous.

Also, the bartenders never seem to kick anyone out at closing time. The place has a bit of a clubby feel to it, because almost everyone is a regular. But Carrie and I don't come here too often—only at … Read More

Our hero gets engaged to the girl of his dreams, a friend of a friend who just so happens to hate the concept of marriage, and who prefers the convenience of an open relationship. Here, how the "marriage contract" materialized. As a freelance journalist, I'm constantly on the lookout for good ideas. Sometimes they come to me in the middle of a shower, or during a walk. But not so long ago, the woman I refer to alternately as my "life partner" or my fiancée, Carrie, stumbled upon an especially bright idea after becoming the unfortunate recipient of an … Read More

Our hero gets engaged to the girl of his dreams, a friend of a friend who just so happens to hate the concept of marriage, and who prefers the convenience of an open relationship. Here, an introduction to their not-so-traditional first encounters.

It’s just after midnight, and I’m huddled into a bar booth next to Ray, an old college friend who has lately become my very frequent drinking buddy. Ray and I went to the same state school in Pittsburgh, and although we both fled town almost as soon as we graduated--Ray went to New York City and … Read More

One of the most popular articles that we've ever had on YourTango was written by Jenny Block and discussed the taboo and personal topic of open marriage (click here for it). This topic and the author's experience have inspired a bunch of comments from our readership. We received an eloquent argument in favor of open relationships. We're not saying that we agree with Anonymous Coward but we think that he has a very measured approach to an unbelievably tricky situation. Feel free to comment here or on the original article.

I read through these comments, and I … Read More