This trap is so easy to fall into for moms who don’t work outside the home. Maintaining our appearance is something that we can bump down a long to-do list, until it’s so far buried we forget it was ever a priority.
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Now that I'm divorced and a single mother, I don't have much of a social life. Finding quality, eligible men feels more like a pipe dream. Meanwhile, my expectations and standards for a potential boyfriend are much higher now that I have children. And at my age I have a low tolerance for losers.
Apparently some restaurants have recently gambled that they’ll gain more adult business if they ban the below knee-height crowd. The concern about the parents paying for said short children is outweighed by all the single folks who the owners think will be attracted by their less sticky establishments. As a mom, I think I should probably be offended by this, but I’m not. My husband and I are planning a date night out for our upcoming anniversary (go, team), and a sitter is definitely in the works. I’m looking forward to a night without children – and if I’m paying for a night without mine, I probably don’t want to have to listen to yours.
When you're pregnant you run through all kinds of scenarios in your head. You ask your partner if you'd keep the baby if it had Downs Syndrome. (Yep.) You wonder if they’ll go to college. (Damn well better.) And you spend a lot, a lot of time daydreaming about the amazing lives they're going to lead. So of course you consider their future mate.
I understand a man wanting his son to be like him, especially in this particularly masculine way. The thing is, when my husband was circumcised it was because of an actual, honest-to-goodness medical necessity. The foreskin was too small. It was painful. The surgery had to be done. If it were medically necessary, I would do the same thing. But otherwise, why put my son through elective surgery?
While I understand and respect that many women proudly wear their stretch marks as badges of honor or battle scars, I don’t feel the same way about mine. I am not ashamed of them, but if they don’t fade by next summer they won’t be seeing the light of day. I think of it this way: If I have a blemish, I conceal it. If I pack on a few pounds over the holidays, I conceal those too. For me, stretch marks aren’t any different, even if they are a result of my beautiful journey to motherhood.
Two seasoned dating coaches, Julianne Cantarella, MSW, The Courtship Coach, and Elisabeth Lamotte, a licensed psychotherapist and relationship expert, pinpoint the biggest dating mistakes single moms make and share tips on how to avoid them.
If my husband and I aren’t careful, kid-centric talk hijacks our conversations. We talk about things they did that day. (Hilarious. Or frustrating. Usually both.) We talk about dreams for their futures. (Please let them marry non-felons.) And then usually we’re too tired to do much other than watch a re-run of The Rachel Zoe Project. I mean Mad Men.
After three months of being a tattooed mom, I have felt those judging eyes as I walk away. In all likelihood, any opinion they formed about me has morphed into something else. Which just makes me want to tattoo the following down my arm: I’m a breastfeeding, baby-wearing, co-sleeping, cloth diapering mom. I’m married. I own a home and a late model car. I have never received a speeding ticket, let alone been convicted of a crime. Too long?
My husband and I seem to parent our children differently based on their genders, a tendency I never expected, being the enlightened and empowered woman I am. (“Roar” and all that.) Once we had both a boy and a girl, though, this tendency became obvious.