How we've found a balance between drastically different disciplinary styles.
I love how calmly my husband reacts when his car is broadsided by a bicycle. I love how he’s ready to hug me well before I’m done yelling during a fight. But I don't love how his chill approach to life has him giving the kids a raised eyebrow and a head shake when I think they need a timeout. Honestly? Sometimes it sucks being the heavy. Every once in awhile, I'd like to be the one letting the kids off the hook while he enforces the discipline. It just never works out that way.
Why I planned my career around a yet-to-be-conceived child.
I determined that I wanted to be a writer when I was 5. At about the same time, I decided that I would also be a mother. 22 years later, I still wanted to be a writer... and a mother. And more than anything else, I wanted to be home to raise my children. So my husband and I sat down and hashed out how we could keep me at home full-time without going bankrupt, going into foreclosure, becoming homeless and perhaps resorting to cannibalism.
Sharing a bed with my wife after years of co-sleeping was better than I could imagine.
It's been so long. How would we really like it? Was it too close? Would we actually lose touch because we were no longer forced to get creative when it came to finding those small moments of intimacy? Um... the answer is no. Oh my goodness, no. No no no no no. This tiny bedroom feels like the most luxurious hotel.
Ten tips for married moms looking to thrive through grad school.
About five years ago, just after enrolling in graduate school, I read that—for married women—attending graduate school is sometimes the fast road to divorce. Yikes. More than two years after finishing my degree, my husband and I are still together—it's been 22 years now—and the D word was only uttered once, in the pitch of (a stupid) battle.
How one woman's upgrade to minivan affects her sense of self.
Six weeks ago, I was cruising through my happily-ever-after in a mid-size SUV. I had one foot planted in soccer mom territory, the other firmly in "I’m still the cool chick I was before I had kids" land. My vehicle reflected this. But five weeks and three days ago came the news that the stork had us on his spring delivery schedule. This is when my husband suggested the mini-van.
Throw away the basal thermometer! Babymaking sex can be good for you.
My sex life isn't exactly fireworks and handcuffs and a regular reenactment of the Kama Sutra. In fact, when my husband and I first decided to throw away the birth control pills and condoms and try for a baby, I worried: I wanted to be a mom so damn bad, but the frequency with which we had sex was definitely lacking, and I often experienced pain during sex. Amazingly, babymaking sex has totally improved my sex life.
In our tiny apartment, we gave our kids the master bedroom to help our marriage.
We're giving the big bedroom to our kids. It seems a little counterintuitive, but by squeezing our bed into the closet-like second bedroom, it gives us an outside shot at an adult space.