We told you where to get great snail mail cards for the sarcastic in you, but here is a source of some of the most wry, dark, online cards going "when you care enough to hit send." Someecards has a variety of cards for occasions you didn’t even know you needed cards for, but there are some V-Day cards that are decidedly memorable like, “As fuck buddies, we should fuck this Valentine’s Day” and “This Valentine’s Day, I want you to know exactly how I feel about you in someone else’s words.” You will definitely find what you didn’t know you were looking for here and get an out loud chuckle at the same time.
Boy, people really have money to throw around these days. First, the $15K proposal, and now this. But did we mention $25,000 gets you a live performance? Even if your bank account won’t allow for such luxuries, musician Brian Alex might have something in your price range, as Yahoo! reports. The songwriter and performer will create a custom love song for you for your loved one, from $2,000 and up. The former wedding singer noticed that men had difficulty expressing their emotions and thought up Custom Love Songs. Says the article:
In regions of the country where prostitution is legal, the Aphrodite Project Platforms are causing quite a stir. These shoes - of which a concept pair are on display at the Museum of Sex in New York City - look like the stereotypical "hooker heels" but are decked out with a panic button and a GPS system.
We’re a little bit preoccupied with V-day here at Tango and recently saw a great gift idea in New York Magazine. It’s one of our favorite childhood books by Dr. Seuss and Roy McKie, My Book about Me. You get two copies, for you and your sweetie, and after you’ve filled them out and answered burning questions like, “How many steps is it to your nearest mailbox?" and "What’s your favorite food?" you exchange them. If you have the copy you filled out when you were five years old, all the better.
Discussion around the office this morning centered on Lipstick Jungle, which premiered last night. Being NYC natives, we feel it’s our responsibility to clear up a few things. Elements that were realistic: The cut-throat business mentality. We’re more familiar with the mag business, and yes, it’s competitive and cut-throat as hell. As for the fashion industry, it too is a fickle beast. The cupcakes. New Yorkers have developed a codependence on Magnolia, Buttercup, and the dozen other cupcake bakeries, although we’re thinking that, this being New York, something else will soon replace the confection, e.g., [fill in the blank] is the new cupcake. (Pound cake? Magic seven-layer bars? Who knows.) Elements that were not:
People, we need to start having more sex. According to a new Global Wellbeing survey by Durex, Americans rank third lowest in the world when it comes to the frequency with which we knock boots. In fact, only the nations of Japan, Hong Kong and Nigeria have less sex. And we know what the former two are doing with their free time: Getting busy developing superior electronics. Anyway.
The UK Times Online published an article this morning on pick-up lines heard 'round the world. One would think that the U.S. would pale in comparison to the Italians or French, but surprisingly, American men come across as thoughtful, complex beings who executive multi-step pick-ups. One Tango staffer says he’s planning to borrow from the Germans and try out “Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.” Talk dirty to me...
If you can’t swing a trip to Hawaii with your S.O. this V Day, there’s always the Hawaii Chair as a consolation prize. An otherwise unsuspecting office chair, simply flip a switch and the Hawaii Chair’s seat ignites into a swiveling “hula” motion that works and tightens stomach muscles. When you finally do make it to those Hawaiian shores, you’ll be proud to expose those chiseled abs. The seatback is also curiously heart-shaped. Check out this YouTube video of Ellen DeGeneres trying it out on her show. Please tell us if any of you have actually tried this utterly amusing invention! Mahalo (thanks).
The cute title to Peter Scott’s new book, There’s a Spouse In My House: A Humorous Journey Through the First Years of Marriage, continues to wink-wink and elbow-jab at the stereotypical male-female differences throughout the book. Fortunately, that’s probably exactly what a newly cohabitating couple needs; women know they’re completely crazy when they rant about how the plates are arranged in the dishwasher, men are fully aware that towels belong on a rack or in a laundry bin—not the floor. Yet like on an endless loop, we repeat these actions for years, even decades.