Love Buzz

If you’ve ever cursed the woman who gave your guy a lap dance, listen up. She’s thinking the same thing you are. Back off. Behave. And get some manners.

I don't feel a pressing desire to "prove" to myself or anyone else that I won't change, that I won't compromise anything, because at some point I'm sure I will. (Isn't compromise a big part marriage, after all?) But I'm also certain that while bits of my identity are bound to shift, just as I would expect them to with any big life change and new perspective, the core of who I am will remain the same. No new name, white dress, ring on my finger or any other traditional convention is going to change that. For better or worse, I am who I am and I'm pretty solid in my identity. So when I read a column in the Guardian recently by Abigail Gliddon, a woman who claims "when a woman takes her husband's name, she surrenders her former identity and adopts his," I wondered how she came to have such low expectations for other women.

Five years ago, one of my best friends got divorced. Her husband met another woman and left her and their two small boys. Heartbroken and alone, she and her kids moved in with my family while she tried to get her bearings. Oh, did I mention the jerk who left her was my brother? Until then, I had never seen divorce up close and personal. Most of the people I knew were in seemingly healthy marriages. When my sister-in-law moved in, I honestly imagined that home-cooked meals, some pretty new clothes, a bedroom makeover in feminine florals and oodles of babysitting would get her right back up on her feet. After all, "she'd be better off without him after what he did to her." She was smart, young and pretty. Why was she moping around? "Shake it off." I thought. "Get over it and move on."

Thankfully, if science has it's way, men may soon have their own version of a birth control pill. Hooray! Researchers at the University of Iowa have identified a gene—CATSPER 1—that is needed in order for fertilization to occur. CATSPER 1 affects the sperm's ability to maneuver it's way into the egg. When the gene is absent, sperm just sort of bump into one another but never seal the deal. Scientists figured this out after studying groups of men in Iran who were infertile. Researchers are now hard at work trying to dream up a way to mass produce an FDA-approved contraception that binds to the CATSPER 1 gene, thus making babies impossible. Right now, the team is apprehensive that the contraceptive may not be "effective, safe and reversible."

Love Bytes: three must click sex, dating and relationship links. Insecure about being an interracial couple, porn on campus and the problem in all relationships.

Calling all the single ladies! Don't miss the chance to learn dating secrets from an uber-successful matchmaker and the 1,000 men she interviewed for her new book, Why He Didn't Call You Back. If you're a single lady in the greater NYC area, Harvard-educated matchmaker and bestselling author Rachel Greenwald is at your disposal. Next Wednesday, April 8, sign up to glean dating tips and secrets from Rachel and the 1,000 men whom she interviewed for her book.

These victories are crucial to the future rulings in Vermont and New Hampshire where legislation sits on the table waiting for final approval.

Attention Men: Make sure you get those rings insured! Props to this romance-inspired guy for pulling out all the stops on his wedding proposal. After celebrating his 29th birthday at a dinner with family and friends, Don invited his girlfriend on a walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, reports NBC's Today Show, only to have the ring slip beneath cracks in the bridge.

The newest study to surface in what we like to call, "No Way!" science is the age you lost your virginity might be genetic. Researchers at California State University think "sexual precociousness" is an innate personality trait, and that you may come from a long line of lost-it-at-18ers. Nancy Segal, the lead researcher in the study, admits that science will never be able to predict when one will lose their virginity by staring at cells on a microscope. Of course, it's much more complicated than guessing height or weight. Promiscuity and early sex, they note, can be pinned on a variety of environmental issues. After studying 48 pairs of twins separated at birth and 23 individual twins, researchers theorize genes explain a third of the reason why people lose their virginity at a certain age.

Love Bytes: three must click sex, dating and relationship links. Pillow talk, talking about STDs and how to tell the ex to get lost.