Is infidelity ever forgivable? This woman's fiancé cheated on her in what he claims was a truly "extraordinary" circumstance, and now she doesn't know how to move forward… or if she should. Relationship and love guru Charles J. Orlando has the answer. What would you do?
Infidelity seems to be a rampant problem for couples. With stories from real-life cheaters, our dating expert explores the phenomenon of dudes who can't commit. Is cheating more prevalent today that before, or are we merely more aware of its happening due to media saturation?
Women who get played by men aren't "dumb" or "inexperienced". Smart women get played all the time … and not because the guy is bright or smooth, but because his bullsh*t story has enough tangible possibility for it to be believable. Moreover, these "players" aren't useless men. They watch and wait — predators of a sort — and fill a specific need that a woman is looking for. And not just any need, but a core need she wants filled: sex, affection, security, attention, freedom, romance, etc.
As problem-solvers, men look for the fastest, most effective ways to work through issues, and many think the best way is to do that alone. But therein lies the main challenge for relationship dynamics: He wants to work through it alone and thus fails to communicate it, and his significant other knows something's wrong, but doesn't know what it is, and may assume it has something to do with her, even if it doesn't.
The age-old question: What makes a person in a marriage or committed relationship cheat? Despite recent articles that suggest that there is a cheating gene ingrained into the DNA of some men (Really? *rolls eyes*), the real answer depends on whether you’re talking about a woman or a man. Several credible infidelity studies have found that men and women who are cheating on their spouses gave different reasons to justify their extramarital affairs.
BOOMERANG: (noun) A curved piece of wood; when properly thrown will return to thrower. BOOMERANG MAN: Annoying; a man that a woman has stopped being romantically involved with who gets in contact for unknown reasons. (See booMANerang.)
"Honey, I have to join Ashley Madison." So began the pitch I gave my wife to let me join the marrieds-looking-for-affairs website, AshleyMadison.com. It would be part of my research into women who cheat, why infidelity is increasing, and what can be done to possibly affair-proof a marriage. I was proposing to "cheat" on her for a few weeks, to talk to and attempt to seduce as many women as possible, and get a real-world understanding of why women want to stay married but also need some illicit action on the side. Of course, on my end, there'd be nothing more than conversation. She looked at me straight-faced, unflinching. I searched her eyes for any telltale sign of the Charles-I'm-going-to-punch-you-in-the-face-right-after-I-castrate-you look; nothing. After a long pause, I got her only thought: "No, I get it," she said emphatically. "It's a great story. But it’s kinda like asking the newly vegetarian fox to guard the henhouse, isn't it?"