According to a recent study, January is the most depressing month of the year. In fact, a study of 1,000 couples in Britain found that in January, couples fight for more than eight minutes a day and have 20 arguments during the month, compared to about 15 fights in the other months.
It was the middle of the night on January 27, 2001. After another big argument with my spouse, I had finally left. Sitting on a friend’s couch I took my wedding rings off. I was done. I just couldn’t take anymore. A month later, I moved into a rental home with my 4-year-old son.
Think you and your betrothed will stop fighting once you tie the knot? Think again. A new study suggests that married couples continue to argue throughout their relationship about as much as they did in the beginning.
How we fight sometimes says more about us than how we got into a fight in the first place. Living a conflict-free life, especially with a loved one, sounds nice but in reality is impossible. Not only that, but it's unhealthy. Disagreements from time to time, if dealt with maturely and with the requisite kindness, can actually help to strengthen the bond between partners. And that's not simply due to the makeup sex phenomenon, a theme so commonly mimed in sitcoms and romantic comedies. Yes, fighting within a couple is normal. However, within each fight lies a potential minefield of insensitive comments and dirty tricks. Fights are only productive if done fairly. Here's a list of seven dos and seven don’ts to keep in mind when entering a tiff to make sure you’re fighting fairly. Following these rules could be the difference between making up and sleeping on the couch.
Are you falling out of love, or is it just a bump in the road? Lately it seems like all my boyfriend and I do is bicker. It's not fighting, it's not arguing, it's not hating just mere bickering. At some points, I don't even want to see him, because you can cut the tension with a knife. He comes home from work, cleans himself up, and plops down on the recliner for some television (repeat episodes) and his laptop to look up glorified, unattainable goals. If I ask him to run to the store, go shopping with me, or run some errands he is very willing, so most women would wonder why am I bitching?
Travel with a sweetheart always sounds rosy and romantic but the truth is, from morning breath and sharing one bathroom to picking where to dine and deciding who is getting up with a morning hangover to help the kids, can all wreak havoc on your idyllic getaway.
Do you ever feel bad for having a bit of a foul mouth? Well, new scientific research assures us you can ditch any sense of guilt—as long as your cursing is in the name of better health. A recent study shows screaming out profanities can relieve stress and give you a higher pain-tolerance. It's basically recommended and encouraged. Seriously!
D-E-B-T is a dirty four letter word in any love relationship. Money seems to be a sensitive subject for most, yet the topic cannot be avoided when you’re sharing your life with someone. As debt surfaces in your relationship, the tensions rise and daily interactions between you and your partner drastically change. For folks who have debt that is out of control, they are often stuck in a spiral of negative emotions. Feelings that can range from regret to shame, guilt to embarrassment, hopelessness to despair, disappointment to depression, worry to fear and frustration to rage. As arguments escalate and fears rise, the feelings can become more than either person can handle. You’re left feeling like the world is spinning out of control and you’re not quite sure how to get off the ride.
Money is one of those super-charged topics that can turn a conversation from lukewarm to boiling in an instant. Money conversations can bring even the level-headed to an emotional breaking point when their anxiety rises to the surface. Is it our mistaken beliefs about money (that we'd miraculously be happier, better looking, attractive, secure etc. if we had more of it) that has created the place for such a hot button response? It's a good question to ask because our lack of understanding about why we react the way we do is one of the reasons we're plagued with such childlike fears around money. To gain control of your money fears, first you have to understand them.
If you're in a relationship, you've most likely had a spat or two. And according to recent research, arguments about small, nagging things may happen as often as 312 times per year. Some research even shows that how you handle conflict in your romantic life may have less to do with your relationship and more to do with how you were raised. But regardless of all the small arguments, or how your mother messed you up, enduring screaming matches multiple times a day with your spouse, or stonewalling your boyfriend post-argument may mean that your disagreements have gotten the better of your romance. It's helpful to know the hot button issues in relationships, and the red flags indicating that it's gone from lovey-dovey to knock-down, drag out.
Paula Abdul and her beau weren't exactly feeling the love on Valentine's Day. According to TMZ, the former American Idol judge placed a hysterical call to 911, sobbing and telling the operator that her boyfriend wouldn't let her out of his car. They got into quite the blow-up.
Find us a long-term relationship that's never experienced conflict, and we'll check the sky for flying pigs. The feelings of anger and disappointment we feel when a loved one seemingly wrongs us can be consuming, even uncontrollable. But anyone who's lost his/her temper can tell you: getting angry and getting revenge never pay off; they never make us feel better, in the long run.
In the beginning, when you are in love, it's easy to be insular and believe that you and your partner have everything figured out, that nothing can ever shake you, that you will never fight and nothing so stupid as socks on the floor could ever make you raise your voice at that adorable face. I don't mean to be condescending about this. It's a great time. Every couple has it and it is my sincere wish that it last as long as possible. But it doesn't. At some point, in every marriage, you find yourself sobbing into your pillow over toothpaste caps and if you don't you are a Stepford Wife.