![Should I Leave My Alcoholic Husband? [VIDEO]](http://images.tangomag.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/node-full/image_embedded_video/alcoholic.jpg "Should I Leave My Alcoholic Husband? [VIDEO]")
If you're at the end of your rope with an alcoholic husband, you've come to the right place. In this video, Author, Psychologist and YourTango Expert Dr. Jack Singer answers the question: My husband has a serious drinking problem and it seems to be deteriorating. Is there anything I can do about that, or should I just plan on leaving him?
![Can This Relationship Be Helped? [EXPERT]](http://images.tangomag.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/node-full/images/sad20woman.jpg "Can This Relationship Be Helped? [EXPERT]")
In my counseling practice, individuals often come to me for help wondering if it is really possible to save or improve their relationship. Perhaps their partner is totally uninterested in working on the relationship. Perhaps their partner is an alcoholic or drug addict. What are their chances of saving their relationship?
In my counseling practice, individuals often come to me for help wondering if it is really possible to save or improve their relationship. Perhaps their partner is totally uninterested in working on the relationship. Perhaps their partner is an alcoholic or drug addict. What are their chances of saving their relationship?
With the holidays approaching it can be very trying on relationships… especially if you are in a relationship with someone making a go at being in recovery from drugs and alcohol. Most holiday gatherings are centered around alcohol and family – two things that are problems for most addicts. Having a roadmap to navigate this time of year is the key to keeping your relationship healthy and supporting your partner through recovery. Here are our Top Five Tools to Surviving the Holidays with a Recovering Addict:
One morning in November 2009, I woke up after yet another drunken fight and told my husband I wanted to get help. He left anyway. It took me months to get my issues with drinking under control, and a lot of work to reconnect with my husband as "sober me." Though this was the greatest struggle of my life thus far, I’m forever thankful that it all went down exactly when it did.
Most of today’s moms have heard of "mommy juice." It’s a cute and clever way of describing the alcoholic beverages mothers enjoy while taking care of the wee ones. If you’ve spotted Mommy’s Time Out Wine at your liquor store, or are familiar with Stefanie Wilder Taylor’s book, Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay, then you know how mainstream blending the daily tasks of motherhood with a few cocktails has become. As a former drinker and mother-to-be, I'm beginning to wonder how me and my newfound sober lifestyle will fit with moms who drink.
Do not talk this over with your boyfriend. Do not give him any more opportunities to make excuses and empty promises. Simply leave. Leave him as soon as you can. Leave him tonight if you're able. Pack your bags while he's at work or at the bar getting plowed and stay with a close friend or family member until you can get a place of your own. If you lack resources, contact a battered women's shelter in your area that can provide a safe place, counseling, and assistance in getting set up in your own home. You don't have to do this alone. There is help available.
The trick to dating sober is learning where to find men and how to handle dating situations without the booze.
Alcohol has been known as the great social lubricant but it appears to be a solution for erectile dysfunction as well. A study shows that "low risk drinkers" (4 drinks per day) are actually less likely to have problems below the belt than teetotalers. That's well and good but a man who goes out and gets drunk is still likely to experience some issues in that arena. But the inebriated fellow is also up for drunk sex and all of the demolished inhibitions that entails. It's a tough choice, responsible man with ED, alcoholic with functioning tackle or binge-drinking wild card.
"When I think about her, I don't think: drunk. I think: runner. I think: artist. I see her dancing around our apartment, mouthing the words to Motown songs but miming disco moves. I consider how her voice deepens when she wants to talk about something serious, how she has no tolerance for indirect conversation or ambiguous language. I remember how my hands trembled when I met her. She wakes up in the morning in the middle of a conversation, asking, "What's the difference between a barnacle and a crustacean?" She has a long list of wacky endearments for me, including "my fresh coat of paint" and "my little prize-winning chicken," and she's in the very small group of people who think I'm fun--even when she's sober."
