It started with a flirty dance while out with friends. It turned into a torrid year-long affair that her husband never knew about. One writer shares her tale of infidelity and how, against all odds, adultery put her on the path back to her husband. "I heard the warning voice in my head reminding me that this was dangerous territory: however alone I might feel, I was, in fact, married. And then, for the first time in 10 years, I silenced it. As Alex placed his hands on my hips, I knew with absolute clarity that I was about to have an affair. I knew it was a decision that could unravel even the strongest of unions. I never could have guessed that it would save mine."
Many relationships “survive” infidelity. Current research estimates that about 30% of relationships touched by infidelity do not dissolve. Relationships are always fluid and surviving does not mean the relationship stays the same. A new relationship emerges when a couple decides to remain together. Some couples use the crisis as an opportunity to confront issues that interfered with closeness and commitment. These relationships have the potential to become better and stronger. Some relationships remain intact with significant emotional damage.
It may not have occurred to you, but if you are a married woman, be very wary of a sweet-talking single man who offers an understanding ear – and maybe even roaming hands. A married client of mine recently relayed a story of a networking lunch that took an unexpected turn when the man let her know that he was interested in a type of business she had not expected at all. He knew very well that she was married – and a Mom – but that didn’t bother him in the least. Getting tangled up in a web of deceit
Let's start with the idea that the point of marriage is emotional connection. A long lasting marriage needs to foster trust and acceptance of each other's emotional tender spots. No wonder they say marriage is work. We get tired of our own issues, so why not tired of another's?
If you are a woman who has cheated on her husband or boyfriend and you are now dealing with the destructive aftermath and feeling extremely guilty, I empathize. I, like you, have been where you are and it's a difficult place to escape ... if you don't know how.
Since 1994, we have worked with thousands of marriages, many affected by infidelity, though all the other problems have been represented in quantity as well. Control and domination, addiction, anger, step-family difficulties, in-law problems, and more lead people to contact us for help. They do not always call to seek help to save their marriages; sometimes they call because they feel confusion about whether they should divorce or try to reconcile their marriages.
Letting go of anger isn't easy; it latches on and won't let go. However, there are far more reasons to permanently release this negative emotion than to cling to it. Here are six ways to leave your anger behind so you can be more at peace after divorce.
We have all been there. You’re in a relationship and find out that the one you love and trusted with all of your heart has betrayed you by “giving it up” to someone else. There’s no predictability involved in the scenario. You might think that things are at their best. Sometimes you might even acknowledge that things aren’t all that great but it’s something you want to work on. You are not exactly sure why he cheated, all you know is that you are mad as hell and caught up with the pain of a broken heart. How can you get past this?
How it Feels: On some level, one of the best ways anyone can relate to what it feels like to catch your spouse cheating is akin to how the world felt on 9/11. I bet you know exactly where you were and what you were doing when you found out. Your life, and time itself, stopped. Living in New York, I can tell you that’s how it felt here on 9/11.
Can Trust be 100% Restored after Infidelity? Trust is such a hard thing to gain, and such an easy thing to lose. Trust is the key ingredient in any relationship. Trust is love Trust and unconditional love go hand in hand
When someone cheats on you it’s like your whole world has crashed down on you. It’s hard to get up and continue on with your life. It’s possible though, you just need to know how to do it. Understanding how to help yourself will get you back on your feet and feeling stronger in no time. Step #1: Allow Yourself to Feel the Pain
Demi likely got a nasty surprise when the papers outed Ashton’s rumored wild night in a hot tub recently. Why was it a shock? Because Demi wasn’t there. Unless they have an open arrangement, they are going to have to do a lot of work to repair their marriage from the hurt, deceit and embarrassment caused by this scandal. While your relationship may not be making headline news, women across the world will have to plow through the same trials that Demi may soon go through, after finding out that their partner has betrayed them.
What do you do when your very public husband is caught cheating? It’s in the news, the Internet, the radio and every source you hear or see right now. Powerful men acting like “Pigs” as Nancy Gibbs so eloquently wrote in her recent article in Time (no offense to the four- legged ones). When I read or see these reports my mind asks many questions. Who are these women cheating with these men, and what is wrong with them? But more curious to me is how a woman decides whether to leave or stay?
We'll be honest here... There is no 100% guarantee that your partner will not cheat again. There is no 100% guarantee that you two will stay together. At the same time, there is no guarantee that your partner WILL cheat again (or at all). There is no guarantee that you two will break up either. That's the thing about life and relationships. They can be nearly impossible to predict.