EXcommunicate your former flame and EXhilarate your future.
Neil Sedaka had it right. Breaking up IS hard to do. But WHY is it so hard? Because we are sentimental beings, desiring of connection. Because we’ve been told that ‘partnering’ is the path to happiness. Because it just feels good to have your best pal around and because there is no rule book or magic pill for getting rid of the longing. When going through a break up, we are in fact, experiencing a death. While it may just be emotional, it carries all of the hallmarks of a physical passing.
The seven lessons one woman is thankful to have learned from her breakups.
Breakups suck. But after a little time has passed, you may find yourself feeling relieved, reflective and actually—dare we say—thankful that you and your former dude are no longer together. Breakups and how they're done can teach us lots of valuable lessons about who we are and what we want.
Letting go was just what she needed to take back her life.
Sure, these days when I get dressed I have to think carefully about which outfit will make me feel least like a tightly squeezed sausage about to be fried in my overheated office. And sure, at this exact moment, the majority of my butt is covered in swollen red pus balls from a terrible case of poison oak I got while hiking in Big Sur. (Ok, I admit it, it was actually while popping a squat in Big Sur.) But mainly, I find myself looking around and thinking, Everything is awesome.
Break Up With Your Ex: why cutting ties with your ex is so important.
Sure, it's time-consuming and awkward to unfriend your ex on Facebook, remove him from your chat list, or to tell him to stop contacting you. But if those things are keeping you from recovering, what's a half-hour of deleting and a couple weeks of awkwardness compared to months of perpetuated angst? Is electronically blocking someone so much worse than finding out via his Facebook newsfeed that he has a new girlfriend? To find out why cutting digital ties is necessary to heal and move on, we turned to the YourTango Experts. Here, then, are eight reasons you need to break up with your ex.
This week, we announced the first annual Break Up With Your Ex Day. By Valentine's Day, we want you to be completely broken up with your ex and ready to find new love. And if you're already there, maybe you have some sage advice for YourTango user Felina. She's on the mend from a painful breakup, but her ex-boyfriend doesn't want to cut ties. Instead of posting a question to Ask YourTango, she made a statement: "I don't feel like staying friends."
Put that on a t-shirt, girl, and wear it proud!
Create a ritual and detox your system from past lovers once and for all.
If the sexual revolution is valid and casual sex is fun and appropriate for some, why is there so much heartbreak?
Why is it so hard to move on after a break up? Why can't some women just let go? It may not be fair, but women are truly "tied" to their sexual partners. It is inevitable....it is hard wired into your biology.
You simply miss who you THOUGHT he was.
Break-ups are one of life’s toughest challenges. Disconnecting yourself from someone you’ve loved, the plans you’ve made, and the life you’ve created doesn’t get any easier, even when you get older. But something that I’m noticing is that there’s a trend occurring. The more I’ve been able to talk one on one with women who are dealing in heartache and confusion. Many of them are holding on to something very similar—an image of their now ex.
Now, what do I mean by an image?
24 Empowering Confessions of an EX-Single Black Female.
I was never a desperate woman, so let’s make certain that is clear! And while we are clearing the air, I also wasn’t unattractive, overweight, needy, or unintelligent. I had my own place, my own car, a very nice career, I took care of myself physically, dressed nicely, I was educated on many levels, had no children and to top it off—I grew up with my daddy in the house. I had no baggage. I was optimistic about the future and had no chip on my shoulder. I wasn’t even loud or obnoxious. In my opinion, I had it going on.
Feeling lost after a bad breakup? How to find yourself after losing your man.
In relationships, we often blend our identities with our partner's, and after a breakup, we feel lost. "Across three different studies we found that when a relationship ends, people think their self has changed. They change their hair, their friends, and their goals for the future," says study author Erica B. Slotter, M.A. While a drop-dead gorgeous new 'do can make you feel better, all this change can be rattling. "Being less sure of who people are contributes to the emotional stress that happens when a breakup occurs," says Slotter. So, how can you start reclaiming your self after a split? Read on.
After breaking up with her fiance, one woman finds support in her male friends.
When you're getting over a breakup you friends support you with support and ice cream—usually it's your female friends who come to the rescue. But after breaking up with her fiancé, one woman realizes how helpful and understanding her guy friends can be. "When the s**t hit the fan with the ex, I immediately called three people—two close girl friends and my mom. For a long time, they were the only people I told and certainly the only people I leaned on for support. And they were amazing, in so many ways. But as more people in my life started to find out, I was utterly stupified by how hugely compassionate and kind all of them were, but especially my male friends."
![Why Holding ON To Your Ex Means Holding OFF On Your Life [EXPERT]](http://images.tangomag.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/node-full/images/independence20next20exit.jpg "Why Holding ON To Your Ex Means Holding OFF On Your Life [EXPERT]")
