Listen up ladies! Here are 9 qualities my 8 year old son expects from his future wifey. Take Notes.
A few weeks ago, I was hunting through a cupboard and came across all my old diaries, including the one I started back when I was 8-years-old in 1981. Within it, I declared all the things I wanted to happen to me in 1982: I wanted to win at swimming, to get a TV in my room, and for Alan M. to ask to marry me him because he's "funny and smart and the best at football in the class and he has nice hair." Alas, none of the above ever happened but iit got me wondering what my 8-year-old son would look for in a future spouse at his age. Selfishly, I wondered whether I had instilled good morals in his little mind. Would he care about a personality more than looks? Would he want his future wife to have any qualities that I have (fingers crossed) or would he demand she was totally the opposite of me? *shudders at that thought* Only one way to find out ...
He wrote these down and said they're in no particular order:
1. She must be clever.
"Because then if I have a son or daughter then she can do the English homework with them and I can do the math."
2. She must be over 30 and under 40.
"Because I am not getting married until I am 35." OK, then.
3. She has to be a little bit strict
"So when my kids are naughty, she can tell them off."
4. She must be fun.
"She has to be fun to be around when we go to the movies, or go for a burger or whatever. I don't want anyone who is boring and who doesn't talk to me."
5. She has to be fit and healthy.
"She has to like playing sport. She also has to like watching sports like football and rugby and cricket."
6. She has to have a job.
What kind? "I don't mind as long as she is happy with it."
7. She is funny.
8. She doesn't smoke.
"But she can like red wine, like you do, Mom."
9. She is honest.
"She is never afraid and she shares her treats and stuff."
So what do I make of my future daughter-in-law?
I'm pretty stoked to be honest! I love that my son wants her to work and be happy in her job and to be honest and fit and healthy. I'm delighted he didn't focus on looks or say she had to be 'thin' or 'a model.' I'm pleased he wants someone who he can share a burger with (I guess vegetarians are out!) and he wants her to be funny and clever. It seems like my repetitive mantra that personality and brains matter far more than a load of make-up and big hair has actually sunk in. It also is really sweet that he understands that all moms need a glass of wine.
I'm a bit confused why they are his kids and not 'our' kids when he describes how his wife will discipline them, but I'm thrilled he's thinking of discipline and manners at all. Most interestingly, he doesn't want to marry early, waiting until he is 35. (I'm not disappointed in this as I am forever telling him to go and see the world before he settles down.) Plus I'm not-so-secretly delighted that he might be around longer before some girl gets her clutches into him, and I'm no longer the most important woman in his life. Tragic, I know.