Love

If Your Relationship Doesn't Have These 5 Things, It Won't Be Successful

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By Brittany Christopoulos

These days, relationships are so glorified online that everyone claims that their relationship is the most successful. But the idea of a perfect relationship is different for every person since we all have different values when it comes to dating.

However, there are some key qualities that help lead to a successful relationship. And yes, these qualities apply to both regular and long-distance relationships.

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1. You have a hangout schedule.

Both partners should be on the same page when it comes to how often they see each other. Obviously, sometimes life is busy, some things come up or schedules change. But if you can have at least somewhat of a schedule of when you see each other, it makes a great difference.

Predictability can help create rhythm while allowing you to function without being with your partner 24/7 because you won’t be left waiting for an impromptu date or cuddle session. It also gives them validation since they are important enough to be scheduled into your life.

2. Your communication expectations are realistic.

Part of being an adult means that you can’t always be glued to your phone. You can’t be working full-time or be taking an exam and be expected to instantly reply to someone’s messages all day. Having healthy communication leads to successful relationships. Moreover, there’s not much room for false assumptions to be created or worry to set in.

If you know they take a break at a certain time, you know you should hear from them around then. Similarly, if you know they have a busy day, then you know that you won’t hear from them much if at all. Having healthy communication expectations are extremely important!

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3. Both partners can function individually.

Being extremely dependent on your partner to function is not normal. It’s great to have support and need it from time to time, but if it’s a daily struggle to do something without them, that’s a red flag.

In adulthood, it’s crucial to be able to do things on your own and be okay with it. Everyone has a life that keeps them busy and they can’t be focused on doing things for other people. The stronger your life can be in terms of hobbies, work, and other people, the healthier.

4. There’s a lot of trust between the two of you.

I’m telling you right now, if you are insecure about your relationship or are always doubting your partner, your relationship is not healthy and won’t last.

You need to establish trust between the two of you. You need to trust your judgment and that they won’t let you down. Without it, you won’t have a relationship to salvage.

And yes, it takes time. But a serious relationship doesn’t function long-term without trust.

5. You feel comfortable being honest.

Honesty is one of the most important qualities in every successful relationship — even non-romantic ones. You need to be able to vocalize whatever it is you are feeling, even if it may make things uncomfortable at times. You need to feel comfortable expressing yourself without judgment and fear.

If something’s bothering you, speak up! Chances are that if you’re that comfortable with communication, your partner will be there to support you.

Any relationship can do well if there are a strong emotional bond, effort, and a genuine dedication to helping your partner feel safe and valued. But without these key qualities, it’s easier to let other important needs fall short.

Any relationship requires effort. And as long as you’re both willing to match it, you’ll have a love story as good as gold and you’ll be able to survive most major issues.

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Brittany Christopoulos is a writer who focuses on women's issues, mental health, love, and relationships.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.